


Will You Be My Boyfriend?

by mrsmikey1995



Category: Little Mix (Band), One Direction (Band)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Barebacking, Bottom Louis, Come Eating, Come Swallowing, Coming In Pants, Confused Louis, Deepthroating, Dirty Talk, Dirty Thoughts, Eventual Smut, Frottage, Gay Sex, Implied/Referenced Cheating, M/M, Nipple Licking, Nipple Play, Oral Sex, Past Abuse, Past Relationship(s), Rough Oral Sex, Top Harry, harry just wants to make louis happy, liam just wants louis to be happy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-06
Updated: 2020-04-06
Packaged: 2021-03-02 05:22:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 32,484
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23509861
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mrsmikey1995/pseuds/mrsmikey1995
Summary: Based on the prompt: "You’re at a party when you spot an ex. Quickly, you urgently pretend to be dating the nearest person, who happens to be very attractive"
Relationships: Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson, Louis Tomlinson/Original Male Character(s)
Comments: 10
Kudos: 264





	Will You Be My Boyfriend?

_ Louis didn’t want to be here. _

In fact, Louis  _ wanted _ to be at home right now, watching reruns of Supernatural while finishing the homework for his journalism class that was due tomorrow, but no. Jade had pulled him out of the comfort of his flat, made him change into the ass suffocating jeans and muscle shirt he was currently wearing, and forced him to come to this party hosted by some frat boy he had never even met. But it was to help rid Jade of the sexual frustration she was going through after her breakup with Matt, so, because Louis wasn’t a terrible friend, he had come. The things he’d do for his friends, honestly. 

Normally Louis was very weary of attending frat parties. Too many things could go wrong. Too many drugs were slipped into too many drinks, and there were too many people Louis did  _ not _ want to see for him to risk being out. But he hadn’t been to a party in a long time, and like Jade, Louis had needs he wouldn’t mind being met right now. But as Louis walked around the frat house, dodging handsy drunk boys and reckless couples that didn’t mind making out in the middle of the hallways, Louis didn’t see anyone he was interested in. Everyone looked the same. They were all overly confident, compensating for something, cocky drunk boys, and that was really not Louis’ type. Not anymore. Not after all the mistakes he had  _ already _ made with boys like those in the past.

Louis sighed as he made his way to the kitchen to make another drink. He knew he wouldn’t be going back home with Jade tonight, and he wasn’t very far from his flat so the two had just walked to the party. Louis didn’t want to deal with a designated walker, so he decided that this next drink would be his third and final one. He weaved his way past the loud obnoxious boys playing beer pong in the kitchen, and grabbed a red solo cup to make his drink. After being in uni for three years, you learned a thing or two about drinks in frat parties. Too many drugs put in too many drinks, and Louis always made sure to make his own or to watch what other people put in his cups.

He decided that for his last drink he’d go a little harder, not yet feeling that buzz he was trying to achieve. He decided that he’d go for just a plain vodka and orange juice, just with much more of the former. Sipping his drink, Louis deemed it quite nice before deciding to make his way back to the living room where the dancing was happening. Maybe he could let loose a little tonight. The night was still young. 

Louis made his way past the rowdy beer pong table with little trouble, grimacing as he had to slip past a sweaty and  _ handsy _ frat boy. He shook his head as he walked down the hallway and back towards the main room. There was a tiny bar-like table lining one side of the wall, with high seats lined up down the wall in front of the table. Not quite feeling the song that was playing, Louis decided he wasn’t drunk enough yet and that he would nurse his drink for a little while before even thinking about dancing. He leaned against the table in an open spot toward the corner of the room. Louis wasn’t really paying attention to much happening around him, just enjoying the feeling of the bass in his chest and the alcohol slowly starting to do its job. Bobbing his head, Louis looked up to gaze around the room, his heart stopping once he made eye contact with the man that was apparently staring at him.  _ Timothy _ . Louis didn’t want to believe it. He hadn’t talked to Timmy in  _ months _ . Hell, almost an entire  _ year _ has passed since the two last had a conversation. The man started making his way towards Louis and he panicked. Turning to his side, Louis grabbed the shoulder of the man sitting in the chair next to him and quickly spun him around. He was met with piercing green eyes and curls that framed the face that looked  _ way _ too good for Louis’ mental state at the current moment. The man’s eyebrows shot up at being spun around in the chair and went to say something before Louis was spewing his own explanation.

“Hi, I’m sorry. This must be very awkward, but my ex is currently walking this way and I need an excuse to get him to leave me alone.” Louis  _ would _ beg the man sitting in front of him if he had to, but the guy just smiled - and  _ wow  _ who looks like that? - and leaned in to whisper in Louis’ ear.

“Sure Tiger. ‘M names Harry.” The man,  _ Harry _ , who was absolutely too attractive to be using a nickname such as ‘Tiger’ for having just met Louis, leaned his head into Louis’ to hear Louis whisper back, 

“Mine’s Louis.”

Harry turned his chair so that he was facing Louis, and placed a hand on Louis’ lower hip as he noticed Timmy approaching them. Louis’ face burned with the close contact with the total  _ stranger _ , but was absolutely not complaining. If anything Louis  _ liked _ the contact. He would never say no to a pretty boy putting his hands on him. Timmy approached the two, his eyes going down to the hand on Louis’ waist.

“Wow, Louis. It’s been awhile, hasn’t it? I didn’t know you still came to parties like this.” Timmy said, sipping the drink,  _ probably tequila _ , he had in his hand. Louis forced a hard smile onto his face.

“Yeah. Sure has been. I normally don’t, but we felt like going out tonight.” Louis said, obviously going to milk his chances if Harry was going to play along so easily. Timmy frowned and looked at Harry, giving him a once over.

“I didn’t know you were dating Harry. Didn’t even know you  _ knew _ Harry.” He said, a grimace covering his face. Louis rolled his eyes at the expression, leaning into the man sitting next to him.

“That’s because you don’t know  _ me _ anymore Timmy. Now please stop looking at Harry like you’re going to punch him. It’s honestly annoying.” Louis flinched at the tone of his own voice, but he meant what he said. Timmy was looking at Harry like he was going to kill him for having his hands on Louis, and he didn’t have that right. Not anymore.

“Don’t play tough guy Lou, you know it doesn’t look good on you.” Timmy spit, crossing his arms in front of his chest. Louis’ mouth fell open, as if this man had any right to talk to him that way, especially now. But before Louis had a chance to speak his mind, Harry was standing up out of his chair and wrapping his arm around Louis’ waist much tighter and  _ wow _ he was tall and Louis was distracted to the point where he almost missed Harry saying,

“Listen Tim, you better stop talking. You don’t have the right to be telling  _ my _ boyfriend what looks good on him and what doesn’t. He could beat your ass and it’d be sexy as hell, so I’d advise you to leave us alone because I’ll  _ let _ him. And don’t think about talking to him, or  _ me _ , anytime soon.” 

Seeing Timmy visibly shrink at the show of dominance made by Harry made Louis feel a sense of pride in the man that he didn’t even know. It was also incredibly fucking  _ attractive _ to see a man like this one standing up for him even though he didn’t know Louis in the slightest. Also how tall he was. And how broad his shoulders were. And how big his arms so obviously were and wow. Louis was gone already and he’d just met the guy. 

Timmy scowled and turned around, stomping his way to the other side of the room. Both Louis and Harry visibly relaxed, but both for quite different reasons. Sadly, Harry’s hand left Louis’ hip and Louis felt his body shiver already missing the heat of the  _ ginormous _ hand that had previously been there.

“Sorry about that. Timmy’s an asshole. Can’t believe  _ you _ dated that guy.” Harry said, sitting back down in his chair but stayed facing Louis. Louis shrugged his shoulders before taking another sip of his drink that he had almost forgotten about.

“Not my finest decision, I will admit. Believe it or not, I thought he was perfect at first.” Louis said, and he could not stop looking at Harry’s face. The jawline on the man in front of him should be illegal, and he could also faintly smell Harry’s cologne and that plus the slight intoxication Louis was currently dealing with was basically  _ asking _ for trouble. “It took walking in on him getting blown by some blonde bimbo I recognized from my ECON 110 class for that opinion to actually change.” Louis spit, and shit. Maybe that was a little too much to share with a literal stranger, but Harry’s face looked so inviting and he was just looking at Louis as he spoke and he seemed to be genuinely interested in what Louis was saying and  _ fuck _ . This is why he doesn’t come to frat parties. 

“He  _ cheated _ on you? That’s fucking awful. I’m sorry, Tiger.” Harry said, eyebrows brought together in a frown at Louis’ confession. Louis felt a string tug at his heart at the empathy being shown by the other man. And at the pet name they were apparently keeping. Louis just shrugged his shoulders.

“It’s alright. Was a long time ago now. Haven’t talked to him since the fight we had afterwards when I broke up with him. I honestly don’t even know why he walked over here. Don’t know what he expected to happen, even if I’m not actually dating you. Wouldn’t wanna talk to him anyway.” Louis said, eyes taking in what the other man was wearing (a sheer button up that was only halfway buttoned and black skinnies,  _ damn _ ).

Harry smiled before placing his hand back on Louis’ hip. Louis looked down at the hand and back up at Harry’s face, enjoying the smile-turned-smirk that was on his face.

“Well I’m glad you asked me for help. Wouldn’t have had the confidence to talk to you otherwise.” Harry said, rubbing his thumb up and down the small expanse it could reach from where he was grabbing Louis’ hip. Louis felt his cheeks tinge pink as his heart pumped a little faster.

“You’d wanted to talk to me before I asked for help? I didn’t even think you’d noticed me standing here until I whipped you around.” Louis questioned as he subtly, not so subtly, leaned into Harry’s hand.

“Tiger, I noticed you the second you walked in the room, let alone when you stood right next to me. Wanted to compliment those jeans of yours but then you asked me to be your boyfriend, albeit pretend,” Harry winked. “And let me tell you. Christmas came early this year.” And Louis couldn’t do anything but fishmouth at Harry’s confession. Louis  _ never _ scored pretty boys at functions. He was the funny friend that got everyone else to hook up. He didn’t like hooking up with people, didn’t see the appeal in giving yourself up to someone to never speak to them again, but for someone that looked and acted like Harry? He just might. 

“Well,” Louis thought for a second. “Thank you, for the unsaid compliment, and  _ thank you _ for telling Timmy off. You were right. I  _ would  _ have beat his ass. Especially for saying something like that. As if he has the right.” Louis scowled at the memory of the man from ten minutes before. Disrespecting him in public like that. He was snapped out of his scowl by the sudden hand on his face, rubbing the tension out of it with ease that made it seem like Harry had been doing it for months.

“Don’t worry about him. He talks a big game but he’s just a dick, you know that. I’ll fight him if you want.” Harry said, rubbing his thumb under Louis’ eye and honestly Louis felt like he might catch on fire soon, his body so hot from all this contact. Nevertheless, Louis giggled at Harry’s comment before shaking his head. 

“He’s not worth it.” Louis said, not making any move to remove Harry’s hands from anywhere on his body. He and Harry made eye contact for long seconds, the exchange filled with charged energy neither one of them could ignore.

“If you don’t mind me saying, Louis, you’re very pretty. Like, incredibly pretty. And you look damn good in this outfit.” Harry said, removing his hand (sadly) from Louis’ face to take a big gulp from his drink, as if he was nervous about the comment. Like Louis  _ wouldn’t _ turn into a blushing mess just from somebody of Harry’s status even looking at him, let alone calling him pretty.

Louis looked down to the floor, trying to hide his now pink cheeks from the man in front of him. Taking the opportunity to ogle Harry up and down, Louis licked his lips before saying,

“You look damn good in your outfit too.” and he smiled when he saw something flash in Harry’s eyes. Harry went to say something, before their interaction was cut short by a short blond lad tapping Harry on his shoulder.

“Harry, mate, Zayn is currently vomiting in the backyard. We should really get him home.” The man said, before looking at Harry’s hand on Louis’ waist and smiling. He turned to Louis and said,

“Hey mate, ‘m names Niall. Sorry to interrupt but our friend definitely drank too much tonight.” Louis smiled, instantly deciding he liked the man.

“No worries man. I get it. Names Louis.” And being friends with Jade and Perrie and Liam? He definitely did get it. Harry looked conflicted and hesitant to leave though, and damn did that do  _ wonders _ for Louis’ self esteem. 

“I’ll go get him and we’ll be waiting in the car. It was nice to meet you Louis!” Niall said, before turning and heading to the backyard, where their friend was struggling with the alcohol poisoning he probably got. Harry looked back at Louis and frowned.

“I really don’t want to leave, but being the responsible friends has its downsides.” He said, making Louis smile.

“I get it. I’m usually the one escorting my friends around. I don’t usually catch the attention of pretty boys who are down to pretend to be my boyfriend for five minutes.” Louis said, grinning up at Harry. Harry smiled and said,

“Oh I’m down to be  _ whatever _ you want,  _ any _ time Tiger. Here, give me your phone.” And Louis could just jump around and  _ squee _ with how much excitement was running through his veins right now. He had been flirted with for the past twenty minutes and now Harry wanted his phone number? He could die. But Louis kept his cool and unlocked his phone before handing it to Harry for him to  _ hopefully _ put his phone number in his contacts list.

Harry held up the cell phone to presumably take a picture of himself before he seemed to text himself and then handed the phone back to Louis. Louis smiled at the phone number named “Haz” with a kissy face emoji and the picture of Harry that was currently displayed on his phone screen. Before he knew what was happening, Harry was taking his right hand in his and kissing Louis’ knuckles while keeping eye contact with the shorter man.

“You better text me, Tiger. I’ll be incredibly disappointed if you don’t.” Harry said, rubbing Louis’ hand with his fingers before he let it go with a wink and turned around to go rescue his friend. Louis stood there in utter shock. As if he  _ wouldn’t _ text Harry the second he got home. The smile that cut across Louis’ face genuinely hurt his cheeks as he downed the rest of his drink before leaning against the table, holding the hand that Harry had kissed. That  _ never _ happened to Louis. 

\-------

Louis hadn’t texted Harry that night. By the time Louis had made it home, it was two in the morning, and he kind of wanted to make Harry wait. Not for long, Lord  _ knows _ Louis was going to text him the next day, but he  _ had _ kind of just. Practically offered himself to Harry at the party. That wasn’t like Louis, but. Things like  _ Harry _ didn’t really happen to Louis either though, so. He decided the only way to not feel too desperate but still not let this amazing opportunity go to waste was to text Harry the next day. 

Louis had walked home alone, as planned, and he had leaned against the door of his flat and smiled like an idiot the second it had closed behind him. Words couldn’t describe how happy and just plain  _ good _ Louis felt at that moment. He wasn’t lying when he said that boys just  _ didn’t _ flirt with him. Ever. It wasn’t as if he didn’t get hit on every once in awhile, and he’s definitely had boyfriends before, pretty awful ones but, they still count. But after Timmy, he hadn’t really. Caught as much attention as he used to. It made him sad. 

It also didn’t help that the friend group he was in consisted of the hottest people that attend his university. Whenever they would go places together it wasn’t surprising that Louis was overlooked and he had learned to accept that he was the DUFF of the group a long time ago. But he hadn’t been with anyone since Timmy, and it was starting to take a toll on him. With the way that he and Timmy ended, it pretty much ruined hook ups for Louis. The thought just turned him off. The thought of  _ any  _ instability and possible areas for ruin turned Louis off. So it was either meet somebody who genuinely wanted him for him and to actually spend time with him, which just didn’t happen, or hook up with random guys who only wanted to fuck him and pretend like he was okay with it, which is also something Louis just didn’t let happen. So. He’s been stuck in this awful predicament and it’s practically butchered his self esteem and confidence. But tonight. Harry. Boy oh boy. 

Harry with his long legs and broad shoulders and huge arms and warm hands and pretty tattoos. With his long hair and green eyes and jawline that could cut diamonds. He had no clue why Harry was interested, hell, he didn’t have any idea why he had even said yes to distracting Timmy, but Louis was so  _ so _ glad that he did. He wanted Harry to be a good guy. He hoped Harry was a good guy. It certainly seemed like he was, what with his protective hand that stayed glued to his hip and the comforting hand that had rubbed his face and the  _ nickname _ and then that kiss to his knuckles when he left? Hell, he seemed too good to be true. But if Harry was willing to give him his phone number and  _ wanted _ Louis to text him? Louis was not about to ask why.

Snapping Louis out of his reverie in the front hallway, Liam was suddenly standing before him smiling at the dopey look on Louis’ face. 

“I thought you didn’t even wanna go to Zach’s party.” Liam said, crossing his arms over his shirtless torso. Liam lived with Louis and had been out with some of his friends from class when Jade had forced Louis to get dressed. Louis had done what only normal people do, texted Liam to complain about how much he didn’t wanna go to the party just for Liam to tell him to stop crying because they both knew he’d go anyway. 

“I didn’t want to. Even saw Timmy just like I was worried about.” Louis said, the smile still plastered to his face even though he was talking about that awful human being. Liam frowned the second Timmy’s name came out of Louis’ mouth, putting together the smile on his face and the mention of his ex in the wrong way.

“Louis, tell me you didn’t do anything with him. _ Tell _ me you didn’t.”

“Ew, of course not Li. But! Guess what.” Louis giggled, stumbling over himself as he kicked off his shoes. Liam reached out to steady him and almost laughed when Louis stubbed his toe on the coat rack.

“What happened Lou?” Liam asked, guiding Louis to his room and helping Louis shrug his jacket off. 

“I met a boy. A really really  _ really _ pretty, really nice, super tall boy. ‘S names Harry.” Louis said, not being able to stop the smile that appeared on his face as he got dressed into his sleep clothes. Liam smiled, immediately knowing who Louis was talking about.

“Harry Styles? Brown hair?”

“And lots of tattoos, and super nice jawline, and really green eyes and, wait. You know Harry?” Louis stopped and asked, turning around to face Liam.

“Of course I know Harry. He’s in a bunch of my classes. Pretty sure we have a similar major.” Liam answered, obviously not seeing the problem here.

“You’ve  _ known _ Harry and you never introduced me to him?” Louis gaped, his intoxicated mind making it seem like the biggest insult in history. Liam frowned.

“It never crossed my mind to introduce you two. He’s in Zach’s frat, and Timmy and Zach are super close, so I knew it just probably wouldn’t be a good idea. I mean, I’m sure you’d get along well enough but I didn’t wanna possibly put you in a bad situation.” Liam shrugged as he explained himself, the tension in Louis’ shoulders leaving as soon as it had come. He smiled. He loved his precious Lima Bean. That’s why he was Louis’ best friend. No matter what, he always looked out for Louis. 

“Awe, Liaaaaaam.” Louis cooed, walking over to sit next to Liam on the bed and wrap his arms around him. “You’re so thoughtful. Thank you.” Louis decided that Liam’s shoulder was the comfiest place in the world at that moment, cuddling into his friend. Liam just smiled and pat Louis on the head. 

“Of course Lou. But how did you and Harry end up talking anyway? He doesn’t seem like the type you’d normally chat up.” Liam asked, letting Louis nuzzle into his side, used to the drunk man's antics. Louis hummed.

“Timmy tried to talk to me. I didn’t wanna talk to him so I spun around the person sitting next to me to ask them to be a distraction ‘cuz I got scared and it was Harry! And he said yes without even thinking about it Li. And, and he even yelled at Timmy and told him to back off when he insulted me. Was all proper boyfriend about it even though I’ve never met him before.” Louis was giggling into Liam’s shoulder like a schoolgirl with a silly crush. Eh, not very far off. “And then, after Timmy got all mad and walked away, Harry kept talking to me and he called me pretty and said he liked my outfit and he calls me ‘Tiger’ and then he gave me his number and kissed my hand before he left.” Louis rambled, grinning harder at the rehash of his wonderful night. Even though Timmy had tried to ruin it. He vaguely remembers Jade telling him in the beginning that she was going upstairs and he could only hope that she got what she wanted and was alright. 

“That’s great Lou. I’m glad you had such a good time. Harry’s nice too, by the way. He’d be good for you.” Liam said, running his fingers through Louis’ fringe, trying his best to work out the product Louis had put in it, knowing Louis would complain the next morning if he woke up with it dried to his hair. Louis just hummed and enjoyed the feeling of Liam rubbing his head. He really had the best friend in the whole world.

“I hope he likes me Li. It’d be so nice if he liked me. I never get nice boys.” Louis said, slightly slurred as he was totally dozing off in Liam’s embrace. Liam was always like a furnace, and Louis has always been a cuddler. Of course he’s going to fall asleep. 

“I know Lou,” Liam said, frowning at the fact that what his best friend was saying was true. “You deserve to have nice boys.”

Liam continued to rub Louis’ head until the smaller man had fallen asleep, and he laid Louis on his bed and covered him up. Liam smiled at the idea of Harry making Louis happy. He honestly doesn’t know how he didn’t see it before. Of  _ course _ they would get along. He was just glad it was Harry sitting next to Louis and not someone else. He couldn’t stand to watch Louis’ heart get broken again. 

\----- 

Louis woke to the sound of Liam singing in the shower, flinching at the light filtering in through the window. He leaned over and stretched, his body cracking deliciously and leaving him sinking back into his bed. He took a big breath and sighed, sitting up and rubbing his eyes. He had to finish the journalism homework that was due at one o’clock today, but other than that he had nothing else to worry about all day. Louis sat up and searched for his phone, not remembering whether he plugged it in or not. He found it on Liam’s desk, on the charger. It wasn’t all the way charged, meaning Liam probably found it when he woke up and plugged it in. The absolute angel. He pulled the phone off the charger to see it was only eleven o’clock. Fantastic. He’d finish his homework in no time and he’d be able to catch up on some other things around the house. 

Looking through his notifications, he saw a text message that made his heart stop. It was from Harry. 

**Haz:** I know I was supposed to wait on you to text me first, but just wanted to make sure you made it home safe Tiger.

Louis’ mouth fell open in shock. What? Harry wanted to know that Louis got home safe. People actually did that? Louis was texting back in an instant.

**Louis** : You’re so sweet. I did make it home. Had a smile on my face the whole time too, thanks to you. 

Louis sent the text before he could overthink it, pinching his lip with his forefinger and thumb. To distract himself from the text he just sent, he looked at the picture Harry had taken for his contact picture. It was simple, just one of him smirking, but it made Louis’ tummy twist, reminding him of just how attractive Harry was. Louis jumped when his phone dinged with a response. 

**Haz:** I’m glad. Your smile is cute. 

Louis grinned, chuckling to himself. He’s never had somebody be this forward with him without knowing his last name. 

**Haz:** Also, tell me if it’s too soon.. But are you free at all today?

And screw household chores. He  _ would _ have to finish his homework, but if someone like Harry wanted Louis to be free? He was damn sure going to be free. But he decided to be himself and tease for a second.

**Louis:** You’re not so bad yourself. And that depends, why are you asking?

**Haz:** Because apparently you’re actually single and I’d like to try my best to change that.

Louis’ mouth once again fell to the floor. He felt himself blush as he replied,

**Louis:** Wow, asking me to be your boyfriend already?

**Haz:** Not yet, but I am asking for the chance to woo you off your feet. I promise you’ll be begging for me to ask you out in no time ;)

**Louis:** Hmm, you seem pretty confident. Pick me up at three and we’ll see how it goes.

Louis grinned as he sent Harry his address.

**Haz:** Yes! See you later Tiger. xx

Louis couldn’t believe it. Sitting there, on his unmade bed, still in his sleep clothes, he genuinely could not believe this was his life right now. “xx”? There were people who actually said that? Louis fell back onto his bed with a giggle, holding the phone to his chest as if it were worth millions. And right now? To Louis, it was.

As Louis was having his mini freak out on his bed, Liam walked out of the bathroom and into their room. He only had a towel wrapped low around his waist, and if Liam wasn’t practically his  _ brother _ , he would be all  _ over _ him. But he was. So. Ew. 

“Liam! Ohmigod.” Louis said, kicking his feet like he was a fifteen year old girl who just got asked to formal by her crush. Which, again, not very far off. Liam laughed as he gathered his clothes. 

“What Lou?”

“Harry asked me on a date! He’s so like. Blunt, too. He just. Kept complimenting me with like complete confidence. And he was like, ‘apparently you’re single and I want to change that’ and ‘I’m asking too woo you’ and it was just. Eeeee!” Louis giggled as he sat up so quickly he got a head rush. Liam looked at him and smiled.

“That’s good Lou. I’m happy for you.” Liam dropped the towel and began to get dressed. Louis wasn’t phased, nothing he hasn’t seen before.

“He’s picking me up at three. I have no clue what we’re doing. Oh god what am I gonna  _ wear _ ?” Louis panicked, not believing he hadn’t asked Harry what they were doing that night. Luckily, almost as if God himself was for some reason watching over Louis that morning, his phone buzzed with another text message.

**Haz:** By the way, just dress casual. You’d look good in anything.

And if Louis made a sound that could easily compete with this fifteen year old girl he’s been comparing himself to, then no one else had to know but him and Liam. 

\----

Louis had finished his homework in fifteen minutes flat, too excited for his activities that would be happening later in the day to even think about what he was writing down on the page. He wasn’t stupid though, so he  _ did _ proofread his article before sending it in to his teacher, and he was honestly impressed with what excitement can do to someones focus. Once he was finished with that, he checked his classes online to see if there was any other work he needed to do, or  _ could _ do, and after seeing nothing he decided that he would take a shower. 

Louis knew he was probably overreacting about this. He knew that it really wasn’t a big deal. But it just. It  _ was _ to Louis. Timmy had hurt him. He had hurt him really badly. Those first few months after Louis had broken up with him, wishing Timmy would come and apologize to him, and realizing he wasn’t coming back because he just. Didn’t care about Louis? It was hard. And it took him a long time to get over it. But having gotten over it, and noticing how  _ lonely _ he was and how he just never seemed to catch anybody’s eye, it felt so nice to have someone so blatantly  _ interested _ in him. He’s never had someone be as forward as Harry has been. Never. It’s always been mixed signals and waiting to find out if he was good enough or liked enough and it was always so  _ tiring _ . But Harry was just so honest with how he thought Louis was  _ pretty _ and how he wanted to try and  _ woo _ him for God’s sake. So, sue Louis for making sure the smell of his shampoo and body wash complimented the smell of his cologne. And sue him if he took a longer shower than any human being actually needs, to make sure he was squeaky clean and smelled fantastic. 

By the time he toweled himself off and put on a pair of briefs, it was twelve-thirty. Louis decided he was going to put on some lotion. Today was going to be a fantastic day, and he wanted to feel good. He wanted to feel like he  _ looked _ good. Which was why the briefs he had on were his favorite pair, and is why he wanted to put lotion on to make his skin feel soft. He wanted to be confident. He wanted to  _ feel _ confident. He didn’t expect him and Harry to hook up today. In fact, he didn’t  _ want _ to hook up with Harry today. He hoped that’s not what Harry was expecting. He didn’t think it was, but he’s also been wrong about a lot of other things. 

Shaking his head, Louis’ grabbed the lotion from under his nightstand and began lathering it onto his body. Once he was done he waited until it dried properly because wet, lotion covered skin and nice clothes equaled feeling like a sticky mess and that wasn’t what Louis wanted. Once it all dried, he stood up and walked to his closet, picking his brain for what he could wear. 

_ Casual. You would look good in anything. _

Louis smiled, grabbing one of his tighter pair of black skinnies and grabbing the lilac sweater he had been wanting to wear for awhile now. He figured they’d balance each other out enough to be considered casual. Harry might be confident that he’d look good in anything, but Louis wanted to make  _ sure _ he looked good. Louis decided he didn’t want to get dressed just yet. He would never admit that it was because he wanted the jeans to be extra tight when he saw Harry because he wouldn’t have had them on for that long yet. Louis decided to waste the last remaining hour and a half to facetime Jade and hear about her night and also let her rub in his face that she’s the reason he was even at the party. 

\---

By the time Louis was done rehashing what had happened the previous night and this morning, and was also finished hearing about how Jade got dicked down by some guy named Calum, it was two-thirty and Louis decided he needed to finish getting ready.

“I’m glad you had a good night Jade. I have to finish getting ready though, so wish me luck!” Louis saw Jade grin through the phone screen.

“Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do ‘Tiger’!” She said, and Louis laughed.

“There’s nothing you wouldn’t do. Bye Jade.” Louis said, smiling at his friend as the phone screen turned black. Taking a big deep breath in, Louis prepared himself for what was about to happen. The entire time he spent getting dressed, fixing his hair, finding the right kind of shoes, all he could think about was how long it’s been since he’s been on a date. Once Louis had said yes to being Timmy’s boyfriend, the whole “courting” aspect, if you could even call it that, had stopped. Timmy never took him out unless it was to a party or some kind of large gathering. And that was fine. Louis was more than content to just stay home with Timmy. He had loved it even. But he had to admit being taken out  _ was _ nice. He honestly couldn’t remember the last time he had been picked up and taken somewhere. He was excited. 

Just as Louis was starting to get too far in his own head with memories that didn’t matter anymore, there was a knock on his front door. Louis stopped, his heart rate picking up. He sort of wished this date would involve alcohol, because he didn’t want to be shy and awkward and mess things up. That was actually the  _ last  _ thing he wanted. But he shook himself out of it, checking his hair in the mirror in the hallway one last time, before he opened the front door. 

Standing on his doorstep Harry stood there, holding a single light pink rose. Louis’ heart stopped. There’s no way this guy was real. No way. 

“You didn’t have to get me this, Harry.” Louis said, taking the rose from the smiling man. “But thank you.”

“Course. I take this whole ‘wooing you’ thing very seriously.” Harry said, holding out his hand for Louis to take. Louis felt his ears get hot as he took Harry’s (much  _ much _ larger) hand in his, and closed his door behind him. As they walked to Harry’s car parked in the lot across the street, Louis took this opportunity to just look at Harry. He was wearing black jeans with a white tee under a red and grey flannel. And Harry said that  _ Louis _ would look good in anything? Looking at their entwined hands swinging in between the two of them as they walked, Louis smiled. 

Walking into the car lot, Louis wondered what kind of car Harry would drive. He seemed like a bright color kind of guy. Whatever Louis thought flew out his mind the second Harry let go of his hand to walk up the passenger side of the  _ Thunderbird _ sitting in a corner parking spot to hold the door open. Louis stopped, laughing when Harry knowingly smirked.

“I busted out my best tricks.” Harry said, leaning against the side of the car as he waited for Louis to collect himself. Louis grinned.

“Well it’s working.” 

Louis got into the passenger side, smiling when Harry closed his door for him. Getting into the driver’s seat, Louis caught a whiff of Harry’s cologne, the same from the night before, and relaxed into the passenger seat. Louis felt Harry’s gaze on him as he started up the car and began backing out of the parking spot.

“You look  _ really  _ good, by the way. Like, really really good. That’s a pretty color on you.” Harry said, beginning the drive to wherever their mystery date was located. Louis swore if he blushed anymore between now and the end of this date he might explode. 

“Thank you. You don’t look too bad yourself,” Louis grinned. “I really like that flannel.” Harry gave his thanks and leaned to turn on the radio.

The two didn’t say much, they didn’t really need to. They were both nodding their heads to the music and enjoying the comfortable silence they had found themselves in. Louis played with the petals on the rose that Harry had gotten him, smiling to himself and missing the way Harry was smirking in the driver’s seat. Suddenly, they were pulling into a small parking lot right before they had arrived to the main part of town. Louis looked at Harry questioningly, but just received a smile in return. Harry got out of the car and ran to Louis’ side, opening the door like the proper gentleman he was, and grabbed Louis’ hand with his as soon as he was out. 

They began walking out of the lot and down the row of buildings, their hands intertwined between the two. Louis didn’t want to admit how much he liked it. With Timmy, this never happened. It wasn’t that the man had been ashamed of Louis, no. Everyone had known they were dating, Timmy just wasn’t a fan of PDA. Unless he was drunk, then he was the hands-iest person he had ever known. Louis shook his head. He hated that he kept thinking of Timmy, but he was. He couldn’t help it. 

He was brought out of his guilt ridden thoughts at Harry opening another door for him. 

“Where are we?” Louis asked as he looked up at the sign above the door:  **Jill’s Diner** . Louis’ eyes lit up, “I’ve wanted to come here for so long!”. Harry giggled as Louis all but skipped into the diner. Walking in, Harry saw his aunt behind the counter and waved to her, smiling when she looked at Louis.

“Do you know her?” Louis asked, turning around to look up into Harry’s eyes.

“That’s my aunt. She’s Jill.” Harry said, the grin never leaving his face. 

“You’re shitting me. There is officially  _ no _ way that you are real.” Louis said, deciding to pick a booth near the back of the diner next to a big window. He didn’t know it, but this was Harry’s favorite booth.

Sitting in the booth across from Louis, Harry laughed. 

“I may have used every trick I had hiding up my sleeve to convince you to go out with me again.” Harry didn’t need a menu to know what he was going to order, but he smiled as he watched Louis look through his. Louis looked up at the man sitting across from him, who was smiling a smile that made Louis feel  _ warm _ inside.

“You didn’t need to use any tricks for me to go out with you again. You had me at the rose. The fact that you own the sexiest car on the planet and are apparently related to a sweet little lady named Jill who owns the cutest place in town is just icing on the cake now.” Louis said, and this time Harry blushed, as if he  _ wasn’t  _ the one that literally just revealed all of that to Louis. Louis smiled. “Milkshakes?”

Appreciating the change of subject, it was Harry’s turn to grin. 

“I would love to get milkshakes, they’re actually fantastic here.” Harry said, pushing some of his hair behind his ears. “If you don’t mind me asking, how come you’ve never come here if you wanted to so bad? We probably would have met sooner.” Harry winked, causing Louis to grin some more, as if he wasn’t enough already. But Louis was not about to tell him that the reason he’d never been here was because Timmy always refused to go into a place that looked as “lame” as this one did and the thought of coming here by himself just made him sad. So, he just said,

“I haven’t really had time to be honest.” And well. He wasn’t  _ totally _ lying. But Harry bought it and that was what mattered. 

“Well I’m glad you made time for me.” Harry said, smiling at Louis like he meant way more to Harry then he should having just met each other last night. 

The two men ordered their food, and spent the next hour and a half laughing and finding out more about each other. Louis laughed at the expected reaction when Harry found out how many siblings he had, and Louis cooed over pictures of Harry’s nephew and his cat Dusty who resided at his mum’s house back home. When they were both done with their food, and had both sucked down two milkshakes, Harry paid (and had absolutely denied Louis’ fruitless request as he reminded him “Wooing, Louis. How can I woo you if I make you pay?” and Louis hadn’t had a rebuttal for that) and the two of them walked side by side back to Harry’s car, hands brushing each other's the entire walk back. 

The ride back to Louis’ flat was filled with comfortable small talk and soft music playing in the background. Louis couldn’t keep the smile off his face even if he tried. Harry was literally just so. Everything Louis had ever wanted in a guy. Harry was sweet, respectful, he actually listened to what Louis had to say, and he seemed so bloody  _ interested  _ in Louis it made his heart beat too quick. Louis has never felt this way about somebody he’s only hung out with one time. And while drunk Harry and sober Harry are obviously two different personas, they’re both obviously the same person and that’s so nice, because Louis has had his fair share of people that act one way in the light of day, but turn into completely different people at night. 

Harry was singing along to some song by The Neighborhood when they pulled up across the street from Louis’ flat. Louis tried not to seem as disappointed as he really was. Harry parked his car and smiled.

“I’ll walk you up.”

Harry waited for Louis to round the car before he placed his hand on the small of Louis’ back as they walked across the street, and Louis felt giddy with the contact. 

As they reached Louis’ front door, he turned around to face Harry and suddenly found them way closer than what he was expecting them to be. Almost as close as they were the night before. The memory of how much contact had happened  _ then _ really made Louis giddy, remembering the hand that had caressed his face and the slow, thick way Harry had spoken to him. Louis looked up into Harry’s eyes to see a familiar mischievous glint there. 

“I had a really good time today, Lou.” Harry said, raising one of his arms to lean against the frame of Louis’ front door, effectively caging him in. 

“Me too, Harry. Thank you for everything.” Louis responded, eyes darting back and forth between Harry’s eyes that were suddenly so green it  _ hurt _ , and Harry’s lips which he should absolutely not be allowed to look at when they’re standing this close together. 

“You don’t have to thank me for taking you out on a date Louis. It was my pleasure. Thank  _ you _ for even coming out.” They’re both speaking so quietly now, so caught up in the bubble that they created around themselves on Louis’ front porch, both so utterly caught up in each other. It’s actually quite weird to Louis how distracted they are by each other and they haven’t even known each other for an entire day yet. He’s never been so utterly captivated by somebody before that he forgets that his door knob is digging into his back, focusing on literally nothing else other than the dimples on the man's face in front of him. Harry’s eyes move from Louis’ to his lips, and then back up again, and Louis knows where this is realistically going. And, Louis also knows, that Harry has no reason to think it would go any differently. Of course they would kiss at the end of this date, it was wonderful. There was literally nothing wrong with it, and Louis didn’t find himself uncomfortable or sitting in an awkward silence even once. But for some reason, the thought of kissing this beautiful man in front of him seemed like it would break the spell he was currently basking in. Harry was genuinely perfect. Louis didn’t get perfect. Ever. Sure, Louis had liked the people he dated, wouldn’t have dated them if he didn’t, but even he knew that the people he’s associated with in the past have been roughly anything but perfect. None of them hold a candle to how Harry acted today. Even if, most of the time, Louis found himself comparing things to Timmy and thought about what Timmy would say in comparison to what Harry had said, he knew that Harry was better. Harry was so much better. And Louis didn’t want to ruin anything by jumping the gun too fast, even if a simple goodbye kiss was more than perfectly normal at the end of a first date. So Louis did the only thing his mind thought to do as Harry slowly leaned in to place his lips on Louis’. 

He turned his head so Harry’s lips met his cheek, and he gave Harry a kiss of his own right over the dimple he had been staring at for the past three minutes.

“I don’t kiss on the first date, Haz.” Louis said, playing off the sudden shoot of anxiety down his spine as simple playfulness. And Harry bought it. He smiled so wide Louis thought his face might split in half.

“I’m not afraid to put in the work for the things I want.” Harry leaned in to give Louis a proper kiss on the cheek and leaned back. “But I do have to go though, duty calls, but text me later, yeah? See you later, Tiger.” And with that, Harry was turned and on his way back to that sexy ass car of his and waving at Louis before he sped down the road and Louis  _ still _ hadn’t gone back inside yet. He touched his face where Harry’s lips had just been, and smiled to himself. He didn’t know why he felt so apprehensive about kissing someone else all of the sudden, since he thought he’d wanted nothing more than attention like that for these past few months, but he decided not to look too far into it. He and Timmy dated for a long time, and nobody had shown such an  _ interest _ in him since they broke up, so it would probably take awhile before Louis was used to the attention coming from someone that wasn’t him. But God, Louis hoped it would be sooner rather than later because he couldn’t think of anything he wanted more than to have his lips pressed up against the lips of the man that just left his home. Which. Speaking of. He should probably go inside. 

Once entering his home, Louis didn’t even bother taking his shoes off before running to Liam’s room to pounce on the sleeping man’s back. Liam groaned, letting out a string of curses towards the smaller man for waking him up from his daily post-work out nap, but as soon as he heard the reason for Louis’ sudden burst of energy he smiled and pulled Louis into a cuddle, letting the man tell him all about his date.

\----

Turns out, Louis really doesn’t kiss on the first date. Or the second. Or the third. Hell, not even on the fourth date. It took Louis five dates, to actually go through with kissing Harry. It wasn’t like he hadn’t wanted to. No. That was actually the farthest thing from the truth. All Louis could think about when he was with Harry, and even when he wasn’t with him, was kissing the man. He’s felt them on his face and his hands enough times to have a good idea of what they’d feel like on his lips, and honestly, he’s so over being afraid of messing up this thing they’ve got going on, because he knows he’s not the only one that wants it. Every time he and Harry get close enough to kiss, he can tell how much the other man wants to go through with it. He can tell how much Harry is genuinely holding himself back from just grabbing Louis’ face and covering his mouth with his, and sometimes Louis wishes he just would so he wouldn’t have to  _ think _ about it so much. But Harry is nothing if not respectful. Harry knows that Louis wants to take everything slow, and while he may not have had this in mind when he pictured just how slow “slow” was, but he was true to his word when he said he was willing to work for things he wants. He never does anything without Louis’ obvious permission, and he always just gives him little kisses on the cheek, or the forehead, or sometimes even his hand as they’re parting ways if he’s feeling extra fancy. 

Louis is eternally grateful for the amount of patience Harry has had with him, knowing that most guys would be incredibly put off by the person they were currently seeing not wanting to kiss them a month into them actually seeing each other. But Harry just, gets it somehow. Harry just genuinely understands him and actually cares about him and this past month has been filled with them hanging out and Harry taking him on dates and it’s the best month Louis’ had in as long as he can remember. They’re currently at some fancy Italian place, a restaurant Harry had to convince Louis to let him take him to once he figured out the destination. It was definitely the fanciest out of all of their dates, and Harry bought Louis wine and they were just talking and having such a good time and Louis honestly wanted to cry. He can genuinely say that he has never been on a date like this. Timmy would never be caught dead in a place like this, especially not just to waste money on something as dumb as a date. And Louis had always convinced himself that he was okay with that, that he agreed that the idea of wasting money on food you could cook at home and going out when you could just spend time at home was dumb, but Louis wasn’t fooling anyone. This was  _ nice _ . Louis felt nice. Louis felt like Harry actually wanted to spend time with him. And he didn’t need the fancy restaurant or Harry spending money on him or any of the superficial stuff, not really, but dammit. It felt nice. It felt really nice to feel pampered for once. It felt nice to feel cared for. 

The two of them ate their dinner and giggled and ignored the few glares they got from other customers, because for the two of them, nothing could disturb them. They were just having a good time. Nothing was going to ruin it. Harry looked absolutely drool worthy from where he was sitting across the table. When Louis had opened his door to find Harry there (with another pink rose, something he hasn’t stopped doing since the first date) wearing the absolute tightest black jeans and a sheer black button up top, also sporting his chain and the excessive amount of rings he always had on his hands with those fucking  _ boots _ of his, Louis’ knees had threatened to give out. He had felt insecure then, about his black jeans and simple white button up. He had picked his tightest, but also classiest clothes he had, forcing Liam to watch him change and rechange his outfit three hundred times before finally deciding on this one, but the way Harry had sized him up and licked his lips before saying, “Damn Tiger, warn a guy.” had every nerve in Louis’ body leaving as quickly as it had come. 

The food had been amazing, the best food Louis’ had in a long time. Harry happily paid for it, before wrapping his arm around Louis’ waist to lead them out to his car. Louis relished in the attention he was getting and the feeling of Harry’s warm hand curling around his waist as he snuggled into Harry’s side as they walked to the car. He missed the smile that broke out on Harry’s face. As usual, Harry held open the car door for Louis and closed it behind him before hopping in the car himself and turning on the radio. “Honey, I’m Good.” by Andy Grammar filled the car and the two men smiled at each other before singing along and dancing goofily in their own seats. They serenaded each other for the remaining two minutes of the song before giggling and settling back into their chairs. Louis took a deep breath.

“Would it be rude of me to say I don’t want you to take me home yet?” Louis asked, raising his eyebrows as he turned to give Harry a hopeful look from the passenger seat. Harry just smiled.

“Would it be rude of me to say that I don’t want to take you home yet either?”

Louis smiled, heart beating less fast. He’s been able to open up to Harry much more than he was at first, and he’s also been able to open up to the idea of Harry actually liking him and wanting to spend time with him as well. It was hard at first, wanting to spend every second of his time with the man but being too afraid to ask because he was scared of being rejected. It took Liam beating some sense into him with his pillow to make him realize that yes, Harry is just as interested, and yes, he was allowed to ask him to hang out more. But he still got nervous sometimes. The idea that Harry was eventually going to have had enough of him and not want to hang out anymore, or go on dates anymore, or kiss his cheek anymore, it made Louis’ heart race, and it scared the shit out of him. But Harry never got tired of him, and when Louis was too afraid to ask for more, Harry somehow always knew and asked himself. 

“Wanna go to the park?” Harry asked, a smile playing on his lips. Louis had never nodded his head faster.

The drive to the park was the same way all of their drives anywhere was, filled with music, laughter, and light conversation that made the both of them happier than anything else could. The fifteen minute drive didn’t seem as long when Louis had someone like Harry to look at and talk to, and before he knew it they were there. As Harry parked the car, “Thinking Out Loud” by Ed Sheeran came on the radio, and Louis gasped. 

“Oh man, I  _ love _ this song Haz.” Louis swayed his head with the starting notes of the song.

“Dance with me.” Harry said, causing Louis’ head to snap up and eyes to snap open.

“What?”

“Dance with me Lou!” Harry laughed as he hopped out of the car, rushing to Louis’ side. Harry opened the car door and pulled Louis out of it, grinning from ear to ear as he left the door open so they could hear the music.

“Harry, we’re in a parking lot!” Louis rushed out, trying, albeit not that hard, to get out of Harry’s firm grasp around both of his wrists.

“Oh come on Lou, there’s nobody here. And even if there was, what are they gonna do?” He said, looking Louis in the eyes. And shit. Louis could never say no to those eyes. But Harry still felt his slight unease. “Please dance with me Louis.” And, well. What else was he supposed to do? 

Louis sighed before nodding.

“I don’t really know how to dance. So if I look like an idiot, it’s your fault.” There was a blush rising to Louis’ cheeks before he even finished the sentence but Harry was kissing it away so quickly he practically forgot about being embarrassed. The feeling of Harry’s lips on his face did that to him fairly easily. 

“I’ve got you Tiger.” Was all Harry said before placing one of Louis’ hands on his shoulders, the other one in his left palm, as Harry placed his right hand on Louis’ waist. Harry pulled him close, close enough that Louis could feel his breath against his face and made him want to close his eyes. They swayed slowly along to the music, probably looking like absolute fools in love to anyone who was passing by, although hopefully there was no one within a fifty foot radius of them or Louis would have to die of embarrassment. 

“You look really beautiful tonight Louis. I mean it.” Harry said, causing Louis’ eyes to open back up. He hadn’t even realized he actually closed them. Louis looked up at the man he was currently dancing with. Harry’s long hair was cascading down his shoulders and his fucking  _ eyes _ were practically shining, even though it was literally almost pitch black outside and they were standing in the middle of a parking lot at the fucking park and Louis just could not believe it. There was no way that this was actually happening right now. Harry was just looking at him with the sweetest fucking look on his face and Louis just couldn’t help it anymore. He didn’t care if he wasn’t ready from Timmy yet, he didn’t care if he was still scared about fucking things up with Harry, all he wanted in that moment, was to kiss the living fucking daylights out of the man dancing in front of him. So he did. 

Louis stopped the movement he had been doing with Harry and took his hand from his palm. He reached up to grasp Harry’s face between his hands, and just simply stared for a moment, rubbing his thumbs along the curve of the man’s cheekbones. Harry stopped moving completely, seemingly rooted to the spot he was standing in. it didn’t surprise Louis that Harry was as surprised as he was. It  _ had _ been a month of waiting after all. But for some reason, the look on Harry’s face, the one that proved to Louis that even if he hadn’t initiated anything tonight that Harry would keep  _ working  _ for a kiss, was what ultimately made Louis actually do it. He leaned up on his tip toes and pressed his mouth to Harry’s, drinking in the small gasp that the man made. 

Harry wasted no time in reciprocating the kiss, immediately wrapping his hands around Louis’ waist and pulling him in so they were pressed together chest to chest. Louis slid his hands from Harry’s face to the nape of his neck, playing with the curls there. He had wanted to run his fingers through this fucking  _ jungle _ that Harry had on top of his head for the entire month he’s known the man, and now that he actually got to do it he was on cloud nine. Louis’ never kissed someone like this before. He’s never kissed someone with so much built up passion and care seeping through it that it made him feel drunk. There wasn’t even any tongue happening, it was just simple, innocent kissing, but it got Louis going in ways he hasn’t been gotten in a long time. 

It took a lot for Louis to focus on just the feeling of Harry’s mouth on his, and not the feeling of Harry’s ginormous fucking hands literally covering the entire back of his body. One of the man’s hands could span the entirety of Louis’ lower back, and honestly it was fucking disrespectful because it made Louis want to think about what  _ else _ his hands could cover the entirety of and  _ nope _ , this is literally their first kiss. No thoughts like that yet, mister. One of Harry’s (huge) hands came up to grip the side of Louis’ face and Louis hummed into Harry’s mouth as he held Louis in his hand. Louis reluctantly broke the kiss, keeping his eyes closed as he laid his forehead against Harry’s. Neither of the two men said anything, both wanting to keep basking in the aura they had created. 

Louis slowly opened his eyes to see Harry looking at him like he hung the moon  _ and _ the stars and it made Louis’ heart stutter, because he absolutely did  _ not _ deserve someone looking at him like that. Before Louis could say anything, as if he knew  _ what _ to say right now, Harry opened his mouth and beat him to it.

“Be my boyfriend.”

Louis tensed. He didn’t tense because he didn’t want to be Harry’s boyfriend. He literally wanted nothing more than to be this man’s boyfriend. But for some reason, the question (or statement, really) seemed to have come out of nowhere for Louis. Obviously, just like the kiss, he knew it was bound to happen at some point, but Louis still just could not fathom the actual idea of Harry wanting him like that. But here it was. Literally happening. 

Harry must have taken his sudden tenseness as a rejection, because he followed with,

“I mean, will you be my boyfriend? You’d literally make me the happiest guy on the planet Lou. I get it if it’s too soon or something but I jus-” and was abruptly cut off by Louis smashing his lips to Harry’s again. Harry made a choked off noise in the back of his throat that Louis drank up, holding Harry’s face in his hands again. 

“Shut up, Haz. Course I’ll be your boyfriend.” Louis said, smiling as he looked into Harry’s eyes that lit up like a little boy’s on Christmas morning. Harry’s dimples looked almost endless with how hard Harry was smiling, as he wrapped Louis up in a hug that took the breath from Louis’ lungs. 

“I told you I would proper woo you, didn’t I?” Harry grinned, wrapping his arms around Louis’ waist. 

“Don’t think too much of it, I only want you because of your car.” Louis bit back, leaning up to peck Harry’s lips again. Louis found that now he knew how Harry’s lips felt against his that he couldn’t get enough of it. Louis meant for it to be a short kiss, but Harry gripped him and kept him against his chest, effectively stealing a longer kiss out of Louis. Not like Louis was complaining. 

The two stood in the parking lot next to Harry’s car, “Thinking Out Loud” long over, kissing each other and simply enjoying the moment. Eventually, Harry pulled away from Louis but kept his hands wrapped around him and keeping him secure against his chest. Louis had to think very hard about  _ not _ focusing on how firm the chest was, but that’s besides the point.

‘ _ Thank you _ , Louis. Seriously.” Harry all but whispered, rubbing his forehead against Louis’. 

“Why’re you thanking me?” Louis asked, playing with one of the buttons on Harry’s dress shirt.

“Because I know you want to take things slow. I know how bad you’ve been fucked over before and I just. You’ve literally made this past month the happiest I’ve been since I started Uni and I just. I want to be able to make you happy too.” Harry said, rubbing Louis’ back with his hands. Louis would never admit it to anyone, except maybe Harry, that his eyes filled with tears that threatened to spill over. Louis wouldn’t let them, but they were definitely there and Louis just could not believe this was his life. He has never had somebody confess how much they care and appreciate him in such an honest and brutal way before. He’s never had somebody tell him something  _ so _ nice before, that it made him fucking cry. Except Liam. But Liam wasn’t the kind of man Louis wanted to lock away for no one else to take from him, ever. Harry was. 

“You are. Making me happy, I mean. You have been this entire time. Thank you, Haz.” Louis blinked away his tears and leaned up to kiss the man in front of him, once again. 

\----

The next few months of Louis’ life were absolute bliss. Louis, honest to God, could not remember a time he’d been this happy with someone else. Harry treated him like he was the most precious thing in his life, and while Louis was absolutely on cloud nine with all the attention, he still couldn’t quite grasp how he really felt about it. He definitely wasn’t used to it. Louis knows it’s wrong to compare Harry to anyone else he’s dated in the past, especially Timmy, but he just can’t stop doing it. It’s such a change in environments that Louis doesn’t know how to properly act. With Timmy, he had made it clear what he liked Louis doing and what he didn’t like him doing from practically the very start. Louis hadn’t appreciated it at the time, and he  _ knows _ that’s not how it’s supposed to be with someone who really cares about you, but it  _ had _ made it easier. With Harry, it’s like Louis can do whatever he wants and Harry would never frown at him. Ever. That stresses Louis the  _ fuck _ out. It’s like one wrong step could be what finally makes Harry snap and decide he really  _ doesn’t  _ like Louis and all the annoying shit he does. 

Louis would be ruined if Harry figured out how awful he actually was. He honestly has no clue how he  _ hasn’t _ figured it out. Louis hasn’t lied or hid anything from Harry. He’s answered every question he’s asked and he’s even opened up on his own about plenty of things, because Harry is just so fucking easy to talk to, that Louis can’t help it. He never really talked about any important stuff with Timmy. He just wasn’t a very empathetic person, and he couldn’t sit still long enough for Louis to actually feel comfortable sharing anything with him. Louis knows that  _ this _ , how it is with Harry, is how it’s  _ supposed _ to be, but he just can’t get with the program. He can’t make his brain catch up yet, and it’s stressing him out because he feels like it’s just another thing that’s inevitably going to make Harry realize he’s too much of a mess to actually be happy with. 

These thoughts haunt Louis all the time. He may not  _ dwell  _ on them all the time, but they’re always there in the back of his head. Like right now, two days after Christmas, sitting on his couch back at his flat curled up next to Harry watching all the Christmas movies they had recorded a week ago. Louis had spent Christmas at his mum’s house with his family, as did Harry. Louis and Harry both told their families about each other, but they decided they would meet each other at a different time. Louis had gotten back home that morning, Harry earlier that afternoon, and they had exchanged their Christmas (and birthday) presents once they were settled in Louis’ living room. 

Harry had gotten Louis a bouquet of pink roses, because apparently that was a thing that was not going away and Louis had admitted multiple times that he absolutely loved it, and he got him season tickets to the stadium for all the footie matches in the upcoming year. Louis thought that was all, and was about to pounce on Harry to shower him in kisses, when Harry pulled a bag out from behind his back. Louis’ mouth immediately hit the floor as he saw the logo on the bag Harry was holding. 

“You absolutely did not do that.” Louis said, standing up from where he was sitting on his calves on the couch. “I  _ know _ you did not do that.”

“Do what?” Harry grinned, cocking his head to the side like the little shit he was, pretending like he had no clue what Louis was talking about. Louis slowly took the Neiman Marcus bag from Harry’s outstretched hand.

“If I open this bag and it is what I think it is, I’m going to kick your arse Harry. I’m going to absolutely kick your arse.” 

Harry just grinned as Louis took the also light pink wrapping paper out of the bag and gasped as he saw exactly what he was fearing he’d see inside. It was a $230 dollar cable-knit cardigan that Louis had been lusting over for months, and this time, Louis actually did cry. One of Louis’ hands flew up to cover the noise that came from his throat as he fingered the fabric in the gift bag.

“Baby, why are you crying?” Harry asked, worry lacing the edges of his voice. That was another thing that made Louis cry, albeit it’s never been in front of Harry before, but. Louis never knew how big of a thing he had for pet names before he was with Harry. The first time Harry ever called him “baby” he blushed like a virgin schoolboy and thought about it for days afterwards. Ever since then Harry just hasn’t stopped, and Louis never wants him to. “Do you not like it? I could’ve sworn this was the one you wanted.”

And now Harry was standing up next to him, reaching for his waist to pull him into a hug and even though Louis was practically choking on his tears he couldn’t  _ not _ say something.

“No! I, I just.” Louis started, setting down the bag to suck in a breath and rub his hands over his eyes. Harry wrapped his arms around Louis and pressed his head against his.

“What’s wrong baby?” Harry said, waiting patiently for Louis to get his shit together.

“Nothing’s wrong Haz. That sweater is just so much money and it’s such a nice present and I didn’t get you anything nearly as nice and I’ve never gotten anything like that and I just-” Louis was cut off by another choked off noise leaving his mouse and he just shoved his face into Harry’s chest to try and hide how fucking embarrassed he was at acting this way. He wishes he could say that he had no clue why he was crying the way he was, but he absolutely did. He’s never,  _ ever _ , received a present like this from somebody. Louis never even  _ really _ talked to Harry about this particular cardigan, Harry had just seen him looking at it on his computer for longer than five straight minutes. 

“Why don’t you buy that sweater Lou? You’d look great in it.” Harry had said, leaning over the back of the couch and kissing Louis on the cheek.

“Pfft, yeah right. Do you see how much this thing costs?” Louis said, scrolling down to the price tag. Harry hummed.

“Shame. Would’ve loved to have seen you in it.”

And that had been it. Nothing else had ever been said about it. Of course, Louis had kept the page open on his computer, but he couldn’t remember any other time Harry would have seen him yearning to press the “add to cart” button on his computer. Harry just cooed as Louis pressed his face into Harry’s chest.

“Louis, that doesn’t matter to me at all. I’ll absolutely love whatever you got me.” Harry said, rubbing Louis’ back as he tried to gather his words. Louis leaned away, and wiped his face on his shirt.

“I’m so sorry for reacting like this. I’m a mess.” Louis said, trying to add a lift to his voice at the end of his sentence to lighten the mood, but Harry wasn’t having it.

“Louis you don’t have to be sorry. I just wanted to get you something nice. I honestly don’t mind how much it was. It was your birthday, you deserve to get a nice gift, baby.” Harry said, leaning down to press a soft kiss to Louis’ lips. Louis whimpered into Harry’s mouth, bringing his hand up to the side of Harry’s face to give him something to ground himself with. 

Pulling away from Harry, Louis leaned his forehead against the other man’s.

“Thank you, Haz. So much.”

“Of course baby. Now what’d you get me?” Harry asked, grinning and nipping the tip of Louis’ nose. Louis giggled and sniffled as he leaned behind the couch to grab the two wrapped boxes he got for Harry. He blushed when he turned around to hand Harry the gifts. 

“Neither of them are anywhere close to being nice enough in comparison to what you got me.” Louis said, letting Harry take the boxes as they both sat back down on the couch. Harry frowned.

“I’m going to love whatever you got me Lou.” He said, looking Louis in the eyes. Louis smiled.

“Well open it then, you dolt.”

Harry smiled, before ripping into the first box. Thankfully, Harry opened the smaller box first, giving Louis a few more minutes to prepare himself for how embarrassed he was going to be when Harry opened the second box. 

Louis will always love the light Harry gets in his eyes when something makes him happy, and Louis will definitely always love when that light is directed at something  _ he  _ did. As Harry pulls out the brown notebook, his eyes light up and he looks up at Louis.

“How did you know I needed a new one?” He asked, thumbing excitedly at the latch on the front of the notebook. Harry was a music major, and he had this little notebook he always wrote his notes and ideas down in, it was something Louis could watch him do for actual hours, but lately he’d been scratching all his notes down messily in a flimsy spiral notebook. Harry wouldn’t be caught  _ dead  _ with a spiral notebook unless his own was filled. Louis looked for days online to try and find one that resembled his old one, and he was entirely way too excited about it when he found one.

“Just noticed that dumb spiral you’ve been carrying around lately.” Louis said, smiling sweetly at the man in front of him. 

“I love it. Thank you Lou.” Harry said, leaning over to give Louis a kiss on the cheek.

“Open the next one.” Louis said, albeit very quietly and only halfheartedly, but he said it nonetheless. Harry was grinning from ear to ear as he opened the next box, although his hands immediately stopped in their tracks as he saw what exactly he was opening.

“Louis. Did you do this?” Harry asked, looking up at Louis in awe. And really, that wasn’t the reaction that present deserved. Louis thought the present was cute, sure, but he didn’t think it was anything jaw droppingly amazing. Harry, for some reason, thought differently. Harry tore the rest of the wrapping paper off the picture frame as carefully as he would handle a newborn baby. 

“Uh, yeah. Yeah I did. Do you like it?” Louis couldn’t help but ask, even though he was pretty sure he knew the answer. 

“Do I like it? Are you serious?” Harry asked, scoffing as if Louis had asked the dumbest question in the whole world. “Of course I like it. I  _ love  _ it, Louis.” 

Louis smiled, but internally rolled his eyes at that. Sue him for wanting verbal confirmation at his gift that rivaled a middle schoolers.

The present really wasn’t that clever. It was a simple hand made collage of the two of them, filled with pictures from the past couple of months and miscellaneous things such as movie tickets Louis had saved, a receipt from one of their dates, things like that. Louis had written a little message at the bottom that said, 

**“Dear Harry, you were my boyfriend before either one of us even knew. I’m glad it was you I stood next to at that party, and I’m glad you’ve decided to stick with the weird guy that asked you to pretend to be dating him to scare off an ex. I’m glad that for some reason you’ve decided to make me the happiest guy on the planet, and I’m so glad that you’ve decided to make yourself a permanent fixture in my life. I care about you so so much, and you mean more to me more than you’ll ever know. Merry Christmas, love. Always in your heart, Tiger.”**

Looking at Harry as the man read the passage Louis had written, it looked like he may even cry, and that. That was something Louis had not expected. Harry looked up at Louis and Louis smiled. 

“I’m glad you like it.” Louis said, biting his lip shyly. The next thing Louis knew, Harry was setting the notebook and collage on the coffee table and jumping to Louis’ side of the couch. Harry pulled Louis into a hug that Louis gladly accepted, and he giggled into Harry’s neck. Harry pulled back to look into Louis’ eyes.

“Can I kiss you?” Harry asked, gripping Louis’ hips and eyeing his lips with a sweetness Louis’ only ever seen from Harry.

“You don’t have to ask.” Louis smiled as Harry leaned in to press his lips to Louis’. Louis hummed into Harry’s mouth as he brought his hands to the younger man’s hair and massaged his scalp as Harry leaned back against the couch. The movement made the angle quite awkward, as Louis was still sitting cross legged on the couch and was currently leaning over Harry’s body to keep his lips connected to the other man’s. Deciding to throw caution to the wind, Louis dislodged his lips from Harry’s to sit up on his knees and swing one leg across Harry’s so that he was straddling Harry’s hips. Harry’s eyes went wide and slightly darkened as he placed his hands on Louis’ hips. 

“Hey there Tiger.” Harry smirked, licking his lips before connecting their lips together again. Louis guided his hands to their normal place in Harry’s hair, swallowing up the small moan Harry gave as Louis scratched his scalp. 

Now, the two of them have definitely made out. They’ve been dating for months now, and they were both young men and Louis had not had a problem with sticking his tongue in Harry’s mouth after a couple of days of them kissing, especially once he found out Harry almost  _ always _ tastes like spearmint. But they’ve done absolutely nothing else. This position is actually the most sexual encounter the two men have found themselves in and that’s probably why Harry’s eyes went dark as quick as they did. 

Louis slipped his tongue into Harry’s mouth, tracing the back of Harry’s teeth with his tongue, enjoying the minty taste of the other man’s mouth. Harry moaned as their tongues connected and they tasted each other. To say that the noises Harry  _ always _ let come out of his mouth got Louis riled up, would be an understatement. But they’ve never been in such a compromising position such as this one before, and Louis honestly couldn’t tell where this might go, especially with how his mind was slowly fogging up with Harry’s hands moving from his hips to his lower back, right above the waistband of the joggers he was currently wearing. Louis knew he wanted Harry. He knew how he felt, he just knew there were some things he still didn’t have figured out, which is why every time before this, Louis had stepped away when things even  _ looked _ like they might get carried away. But now, things were  _ already _ carried away, and Louis found himself wanting nothing more than for Harry’s hands to travel farther down south. 

Louis didn’t know how to ask for that though. He didn’t even know if that was something Harry even wanted, so he just pushed his tongue into Harry’s mouth further, and moaned into the younger’s mouth to try and convey how he was feeling. Harry drank up the noise Louis made, this being the first sexual noise he’s ever made other than pleasant and pleased hums around Harry, and thankfully understood the message Louis was sending to him. Louis broke the kiss to get a breath in as Harry finally slid his hands down to Louis’ arse to grip a cheek in each hand, almost lovingly. Squeezing each cheek and effectively squeezing a gasp out of Louis as well. Louis panted into Harry’s mouth as the man kissed across his jawline and continued to grip his arse in his hands. Louis was subconsciously slowly grinding back into Harry’s huge fucking hands as he pressed his mouth back to Harry’s in a rushed and dirty kiss that was different then any other kiss the two men have shared before. 

Harry broke apart the kiss to give a harder, but still not rough, squeeze to Louis’ bottom that caused the older man to fall further onto Harry’s lap and right on Harry’s  _ quite _ obvious interest. Louis gasped as Harry moaned at the new pressure on his fattening up cock. 

“Baby, can I touch you? Can I get my hands on you?” Harry asked, rocking his hips up into Louis’ as he nosed along Louis’ neck. Louis could hardly think, let alone answer a question such as that. This was the closest thing Louis’ had to sex in almost an entire year and he was practically dizzy with it. Louis just nodded his head and pressed his lips back to Harry’s. 

Harry felt  _ massive _ underneath Louis, and Louis was almost drooling with the sudden rush of ideas that came crashing through his head. He wanted so much at once, that he couldn’t even pinpoint a single thing to ask for. Louis was brought out of his thoughts of Harry’s prick at the feeling of Harry’s calloused fingertips finding their way underneath the band of Louis’ joggers. It sent chills up Louis’ spine that made him shiver. Harry’s hands kept moving under the joggers, until he met the waistband of Louis’ pants and slowly made their way under those too, and before Louis knew it, Harry’s bare hands were covering his bare arse cheeks and he could hardly breathe with how good it felt. Harry was so warm and big and hard literally  _ everywhere _ and Louis positively could not think. Harry gripped him hard once, effectively spreading his arse apart and causing a groan to fall from his lips and made Louis drop his head to Harry’s shoulder. Louis grinded back into Harry’s hands, and also ground forward onto Harry’s hard cock as he placed soft kisses along the span of Harry’s neck. Harry shifted his hands slightly, and suddenly his hands were closer together and the tips of his fingers grazed the sensitive area near his hole and it was like a flip switched. 

Louis’ entire body tensed up and the cold sting of pure anxiety zipped down Louis’ spine and his mind screamed “No!” and “Wrong person!”, and Louis honestly wanted to cry. Because this is what happens every single time. Granted, he had never gotten this far, but this  _ was  _ the reason he hadn’t gotten this far with Harry. Louis’ body rejected every idea of intimacy with Harry, and it was absolutely unfair. 

Harry noticed the second Louis tensed up and immediately stopped everything he was doing.

“Lou? Baby? You okay?” He asked. Louis squeezed his eyes shut and shook his head in the crook of Harry’s neck.

“No, um. Actually, can you, um. Can you actually stop? Like, what you’re doing? With your hands.” Louis all but whimpered out, missing the feeling of Harry’s hands the second they were gone because the man of course listened right away. 

“Did I do something wrong? Did you not like it? Did you not want me to do that?” Harry rambled, rubbing his hands up and down Louis’ back, obviously thinking the worst and blaming himself. Louis felt awful. He wished he could tell Harry what he felt, but he didn’t even know what he felt. How was Harry the wrong person? If anything he was the only  _ right _ person Louis had ever had the chance to be with. Who  _ was _ the right person, if Harry wasn’t? Timmy? Was that what this was all about? How was he not able to let someone else touch him yet? Louis just didn’t understand. And he  _ wished _ that he could tell Harry. Louis wished he could somehow explain to Harry that no, it wasn’t him. It was Louis. It was Louis still somehow being so hung up over his ex that he can’t have your hands near his arse for some reason, but he couldn’t. There was no way he could tell Harry that without ruining everything. 

When Louis didn’t answer, Harry of course thought the worst.

“Oh god, did you not want me to do that? Did I read all of that wrong? Jesus Louis, I am so fucking sorry. I should’ve clarified again with you before touching you like that. Please don’t hate me for this, I promise I’ll do anything to make it up to you.” Harry sputtered, subconsciously holding Louis closer to his chest as if he was afraid Louis was going to run away. Louis didn’t know what to say, so he just leaned up and kissed Harry to get him to shut up. Harry immediately relaxed into Louis’ mouth, and it made Louis feel worse. This man deserved the fucking world, and Louis couldn’t even give him pleasure without having an anxiety attack for a reason that was nowhere near Harry’s fault. 

“It’s not your fault. Can we just watch another movie?” Louis whispered into Harry’s mouth, unable to look into Harry’s eyes. Harry wasted no time in re-situating the two of them, so that Louis was now off of his lap and pressed into his side. 

“Of course, baby. I’ll turn the TV back on.” Harry said before grabbing the remote, and that was that. Louis had gone soft the second he tensed up, but Harry was obviously still half hard, and it just taunted Louis as he sat next to the man of his literal dreams, but was unable to actually do anything to make him want to stay. The fact that Harry had stopped right away, before Louis had even asked him to, had taken everything so well, didn’t blame him for anything what so ever, made Louis want to cry for what seemed like the hundredth time that night. All of those points just further proved that Harry  _ should _ be the right one, but for some reason, he just wasn’t. Louis couldn’t figure it out. 

Louis doesn’t  _ always _ dwell on the thoughts in his head of Harry leaving him because of his problems that he can’t quite decipher, but right now, sitting in his living room next to a half hard Harry while watching Charlie Brown because Harry  _ knows _ it’s his favorite Christmas movie, he definitely dwells on it.

\---- 

It’s been two months since the first  _ incident _ , as Louis calls it. It’s been two months, of simultaneously the best and worst moments of his life. The best, because he’s spent the two months with Harry, and Harry has never once made him feel anything but happy and amazing and cared for. The worst, because Louis still couldn’t give Harry, or  _ himself _ , what they both need. There’s been multiple more times exactly like the first incident, and it’s killing Louis. It’s absolutely tearing Louis apart because all he wants is to be close like that with Harry, all he wants is to make Harry feel half as good as he makes Louis feel, but he just  _ can’t _ . Every time they made out, he was able to do it without getting uncomfortable. So each time he thought,  _ this is it _ .  _ This is the time. _ But every time they’d touch something private Louis would clam up and shut Harry out. Recently, he couldn’t stand the sight of Harry’s such obvious  _ disappointment _ that flashed across his face when Louis got uncomfortable, so Louis decided that he would no longer put himself in that kind of situation. He wouldn’t let anything get that far. 

So it’s been about two weeks of dodging affection, cutting things so much shorter than he’d ever cut anything before, and almost limiting things to the way things were like before they officially started dating. He knew Harry could tell something was up. He knew Harry was also hurt by it, but Louis could not stand the thought of the fact that he was practically leading Harry on every single day and then leaving him high and dry and he just. He couldn’t do it. He couldn’t stomach it. He just couldn’t. He couldn’t keep looking at Harry and see him be so blatantly  _ disappointed _ by something  _ Louis  _ had done.

Harry had suggested a date night. They hadn’t gone on an actual date in quite some time, both being incredibly caught up with Uni and family and whatever unspoken  _ thing _ that was happening between the two of them. Louis had immediately been against the idea in his head, knowing how hard it’d be to not be close and personal on a  _ date _ night, but he could physically see how badly Harry wanted the time with Louis, and Louis had never been good at saying no to Harry’s eyes when they looked like that. Harry had decided he would cook for Louis at his apartment and they would just have a nice night in together, and he even said he’d watch Grease with Louis for the eight hundredth time, and, well, Louis couldn’t say no to that. 

By the time the day of the date night came around, Louis actually found himself looking forward to it. He missed Harry. He missed the man  _ so _ fucking much it actually hurt him to be doing what he was doing. He missed kissing him. He did. He missed touching him, hugging him, cuddling with him, dancing with him, he missed everything they did with each other when Louis was actually comfortable. He  _ wished _ he could be comfortable again. He didn’t understand why he couldn’t be. He didn’t understand why his body wanted Timmy so bad when he hadn’t spoken to him in months. He didn’t understand  _ any _ of it. But tonight, Louis felt hopeful. He didn’t know why, but he did. He felt giddy and excited and honestly, he was so over not being all over Harry when all he wanted was exactly that. Tonight he was going to try, and for some reason. Tonight, he felt like he could do it. 

Louis was buttoning up the cardigan Harry had gotten him for Christmas, which he hadn’t gotten to where anywhere yet because he hadn’t had a proper reason, when his phone started ringing from where it lay charging on his nightstand. Louis left his mirror to inspect the screen of his phone, frowning when he didn’t recognize the number. He slid his finger over the “answer call” button. 

“Ello?” Louis rasped, inspecting his nail beds. The voice that responded almost caused the phone to fall from Louis’ hands.

“Louis? Is that you?” The voice said, sounding oddly stressed.

“Timmy? How the  _ fuck _ did you get my number? I blocked you.” Louis said, having to sit down on his bed to steady his legs that were suddenly shaking so bad they threatened to give out on him. 

“I got a new phone and asked around for your number.” Timmy muttered, having the decency to at least sound a little embarrassed. “I’ve been trying to build up the courage to call you for months.”

Louis was at a loss for words. He was so confused. He had no clue what to say.

“Why? I blocked you for a reason, you idiot.” Louis said, practically snarling into the phone, about three seconds away from hanging up.

“I need you Louis. I really, really,  _ really _ need you right now.” Timmy said, sounding close to tears. And. What?

“Wait, what?” Louis asked, never being as confused and shaky as he was right now.

“I need to talk to you. I need to tell you everything.” Timmy said, and yep. He was definitely crying. Louis could not believe what was happening.

“What the fuck are you talking about Timmy? I’m going to hang up on you.” Louis said, about to hit the button when Timmy all but screamed into the phone,

“No! Don’t hang up Louis. I love you. I’m in love with you. I never stopped being in love with you.”

Louis’ mouth practically hit the floor. He didn’t know what this feeling in his chest was, but he absolutely hated it, and he needed it to go away as soon as possible. He could  _ not _ have heard what he thinks he just heard.

“What did you just say?” Louis whispered in absolute disbelief.

“I love you Louis. I do.” Timmy said. “And, I need you to believe me. Even if it’s only for a little bit. I need you to let me talk to you. I’m at Jill’s Diner, that little place close to town you always wanted to go? I’m in a booth and I’m losing my  _ mind _ and I  _ need _ you to come here and let me talk to you.”

Louis couldn’t believe his fucking luck. Of course. Of course Timmy would come back  _ today _ , tell him he still loved him _ today _ , and then tell him he was waiting for him at Harry’s goddamn aunt’s diner. 

“Why should I even  _ think _ about coming up there Timmy? In case you don’t remember, but  _ you _ cheated on  _ me _ , Timmy.  _ You _ let Brittany suck your dick, not me.” Louis said, not forgetting why they broke up and why Louis blocked him on everything and never spoke to him again. 

“God Louis, I  _ know _ I did that. I  _ know _ . But, you never even let me explain. You never even gave me the  _ chance _ . You just cut me off. And I know what I did was awful, and you  _ never _ deserved that, but I never got a chance for closure. I’ve been trying to deal with it for a fucking  _ year _ Louis and I just  _ can’t _ , and I know you can understand that. I know you understand wanting closure. So if your fucking  _ boyfriend _ can’t understand that I need this and that this is the right thing for you to do, then what does that say about him?” Timmy rambled, and the fact that Timmy was even  _ mentioning  _ Harry’s name made his blood boil. 

“Don’t you  _ dare _ talk about him. I don’t care if he’d understand or not, it’s not up to him. It’s up to me. So don’t think you have the right to talk about him at all.” Louis spit. But, Timmy just called him and told him almost everything he’s wanted to hear for the past year of his life and he couldn’t just ignore the part inside of him that was calling out to go help Timmy at the diner. Just letting the man talk couldn’t hurt anything. “I’m not dropping everything for you. You should’ve thought about that sooner. I have shit I have to do, and I’ll be there when I get there. If you’re just fucking with me, or you’re not there when I show up, or you do anything other than talk? I’ll shove my foot so far up your arse it gets lodged in between your teeth, you got it Timothy?” Louis snarled through the phone, not missing Timmy’s gasp on the other side of the line. 

“Thank god Louis. I love you so much. I’ll be here. I promise. I love you. Thank you so much.” Timmy said. Louis didn’t respond before he hung up the phone. 

Louis didn’t do anything for a long while. He sat on his bed, staring at the phone in his hand, wondering what the  _ fuck _ he was going to do. He hadn’t known how much his heart was yearning to be told “I love you” again, but now that it had happened, he definitely couldn’t ignore it. But the other thing he couldn’t ignore, was the “shit” he had to do. What the  _ fuck  _ was he going to tell Harry. He had to tell him the truth. He  _ deserved _ the truth. Louis hadn’t been able to give him anything else he needed, the least he could do was tell him the truth. Gathering as much courage as he could, Louis gathered up his things before hopping in his car and driving to Harry’s. 

After what seemed like years, Louis eventually pulled up and parked across the street from Harry’s apartment. He made his way up to Harry’s floor and to his door with the feeling of vomiting sitting in the back of his throat. He had no clue how he was going to do this. Why did this feel so serious? Why did it feel like breaking up was inevitable after this? Did that say something about how he felt about Timmy? Things had never been more confusing in his entire life. In an act of bravery Louis knocked on Harry’s front door with three solid knocks, his heart squeezing as he heard his Harry yell “Coming!” through the door. 

Harry opened the door holding, of course, a light pink rose, and it made tears threaten to rise in Louis’ eyes. 

“Hi baby.” Harry said in his smooth speech, the kind that makes Louis weak at the knees. Harry pulled Louis into an embrace. “I’ve missed you.” Harry said into Louis’ hair, placing a kiss on the top of his head. When Louis didn’t say anything, Harry pulled back to look into Louis’ eyes. Louis knew the second Harry figured out something was wrong. He stood up straighter and moved slightly so Louis could come in. Once Louis was inside, Harry closed the door behind him and said,

“What is it?”

“I need to talk to you about something.” Louis said, hating how grim his voice sounded. He didn’t even have enough hope inside of him to even entertain the thought of Harry staying with him after he told him what he was about to go do. He’s been an awful partner, and this would make everything so much worse. If Harry knew what was good for him? He’d make Louis leave the second these words left his mouth. 

“Okay?” Harry said, sounding as confused as Louis felt. Louis took a deep breath and willed himself not to get emotional.

“Timmy called me.” Louis said, looking up to gauge Harry’s reaction. The man’s jaw tensed and he squared his shoulders which immediately made him seem three times bigger than he usually looked.

“Okay. What did he say?” Harry asked, still holding the rose in his hand. Louis’ heart broke a little as he looked at it, knowing it’d be the last one he’d ever receive, if Harry even gave it to him after this.

“That he still loved me.” Louis heard Harry suck in a breath. “And, and that he needed me right now. He’s waiting for me at the diner, which sucks but,” Louis let out a wet, pathetic chuckle. “And he was crying and he said I never gave him closure. Which I really didn’t, now that I think about it. I never gave him the chance to explain himself. Not that he really needed to, because he cheated on me. But, I understand what it’s like to not be given the chance to tell my part of the story. And, he said he’s been trying to deal with everything this entire year we’ve been apart but he can’t and he just really needs me right now. And he really needs to talk to me, and I’m going. To talk to him, that is.” Louis said, feeling as proud as he could right now about his voice not wavering once. He looked at Harry’s face, hating how incredibly guarded the younger man so obviously was. Louis could normally read Harry like an open book, but right now, all he could tell was that he was tense. He couldn’t tell whether he was sad or pissed or, even upset. It stressed Louis out.

Harry was gripping the rose in his hand so tightly that his knuckles were turning white.

“You still care about him, don’t you?” Harry asked, voice wavering a bit. 

That question took Louis off guard. Did he? Did he still care about Timmy? It seemed like the only reasonable option. He couldn’t not care about Timmy, but not be able to have sex with Harry, and to have folded so quickly when Timmy came running back to him. Louis didn’t know, but maybe he’s been waiting this entire time for Timmy to just tell him what he’s wanted to hear for so long. He had no clue what was going on right now.

“I don’t know. I mean. Maybe? I don’t know.” Louis said, looking down at his hands that were clasped together in front of him.

“ _ That’s _ why you don’t let me touch you, isn’t it? Because you still care about him?” Harry asked, looking like he was going to take a step towards Louis, but deciding to take a step back instead. “Every time we’d get close to doing something you’d flinch away from me, that’s why. It’s been weeks since you’ve even let me  _ hold _ you Louis, is this why? Have you been talking to him this entire time? Is that why?” Harry didn’t sound mad, but he sounded serious. Louis’ never heard him sound this serious.

“I-” Louis started to say something, but he had no clue what he could even say. “I don’t  _ know _ Harry. I don’t know. Today was the first day he’s spoken to me since the party, I promise you. But, I don’t know.” Was what Louis decided on, and while even he knew it was a shitty response, it was all he had. Harry squared his shoulders again. 

“Do you love him?” Harry asked, and again, the question took Louis off guard. Did he love Timmy? 

“I don’t  _ know! _ Jesus  _ Christ _ Harry, I don’t know! All I know is that he called me an hour ago crying, telling me all the things I deserved to hear a year ago, and now he’s finally telling me and my heads been messed up for weeks and I couldn’t figure out why, and I’m  _ trying. _ I’m fucking  _ trying _ , but I don’t know what to fucking  _ do _ .” Louis cried, throwing his hands in the air. He couldn’t possibly make Harry understand, not when he didn’t even understand it himself. Louis was breathing heavily through his nose to try and calm himself down when he noticed Harry walking towards him. It should’ve told Louis something when he wasn’t scared of Harry hurting him for even a second.

“Okay. Okay then. Go talk to him.” Harry said, looking Louis in the eyes, and once again, what? “If you’re still in love with him, we’ll break up. I can’t do anything if you’re still in love with him. But until you can look me in the eyes and tell me you love Timothy Warner with your whole chest? You’re still my boyfriend, and I still care about you, and I will do anything you need me to do to help you figure this out. I trust you enough to talk to him if you think that’s what is right and what you need to do.” 

Louis looked up at the man in front of him, this man who takes him by surprise every time he opens his goddamn mouth, and wants nothing more than to slam his lips against his. But now isn’t the time, and he knows that. Harry hands Louis the rose he somehow managed to not break in half and cups Louis’ face with his hands. “And Louis?  I’m not afraid to put in the work for the things I want.” Harry whispered before he leaned forward and kissed the top of Louis’ head, lingering there for probably a second longer than actually appropriate. 

Louis basked in those two seconds of contact, the two seconds of Harry’s lips against some part of his body. He missed those lips. He missed them so much. He wanted to kiss them more than anything. But he couldn’t do that to Harry until he figured out what the fuck he  _ actually  _ wanted. So Louis pulled away from Harry, holding the pink rose equally as tight as Harry was.

“I’m um. I’m gonna go, okay? I’m gonna go.” Louis said, motioning to the door.

“Okay, Lou.” Harry responded, and Louis absolutely ignored how utterly defeated it sounded coming from Harry’s lips. 

Leaving Harry’s apartment has never felt like this before. It has never felt like his heart was being torn in two different directions as he left the building and got in his car to drive to the diner. It’s never felt like he had no clue what he was doing. Louis wracked his brain for some possible fucking  _ answers _ .

Maybe he  _ was  _ still in love with Timmy. Why else would he not be able to do the things he  _ wanted  _ to do with Harry if he wasn’t still in love with someone else? And, maybe, this was what needed to happen. Maybe he and Harry never would have worked in the first place. He was always so afraid of messing up with Harry. He was always afraid of doing the wrong thing. He was always so scared he wasn’t enough, he was always so scared and so confused on what he should be doing. Maybe Louis  _ needs _ somebody like Timmy. Maybe he  _ needs _ somebody to tell him what to do and how to act in order to feel comfortable. Maybe that’s what he needs. Maybe he  _ does _ need Timmy. 

Louis made it to the diner in record time, probably because he wasn’t paying attention to how fast he was going the entire time because he was too deep in thought about everything going on right now. Six months ago he didn’t have anyone that cared about him in a non-friendly way, and now he had to decide between the man he used to love and was with for years, or the man who treated him a way no one has ever treated him before and made him feel things he’s never felt. How did things suddenly get so fucking  _ messy _ . Why couldn’t Louis just be fucking  _ happy _ ?

Parking his car, Louis let himself sit in his drivers seat in silence for a few minutes. What was he even going to say to Timmy when he walked in there? What was Timmy going to do? What was  _ he _ going to do? Louis sighed and rubbed his hands over his face two or three times before shaking his fringe out of his eyes and hopping out of his car. He needed to figure this out. He needed to know.

Walking into the diner almost made him want to cry. He and Harry had spent so much time here in the past couple of months, Jill had come to absolutely  _ love _ Louis and the fact that he probably wouldn’t be welcome here after this broke his heart. Louis knows Harry said as long as Louis doesn’t love Timmy he’s still Harry’s boyfriend, but Louis can’t help but be convinced that this is it for them. He would surely break up with someone if they put him through what he’s put Harry through. Harry deserves someone who can give him the world and treat him like the  _ king _ he is, and Louis obviously can’t do that. So he just doesn’t see how this will work out for him. Louis looked around, eyeing the patrons eating in quiet conversation all around him, ready to burst into flames if Timmy wasn’t actually here and was just fucking with him over the phone. 

But no, sitting right there, right there in his and Harry’s booth was Timothy Warner. Seeing the lanky blonde man sitting in the booth instead of Harry’s broad frame and brunette locks made him sick to his stomach.  _ That’s Harry’s spot. _

Louis made his way over to the booth like he had multiple times before, except this time he was ready to vomit at any wrong word. At the sound of someone approaching, Timmy’s head snapped up and the second he saw Louis he smiled. He smiled, big and wide, but his eyes didn’t shine. Not like Harry’s did. Louis sat down in the booth across from the man and waited. Waited for him to say something. The silence was awkward, to say the least. Neither one of them wanted to be the first to say something. 

“If you don’t want me leaving in the next five fucking minutes Timothy, you better open your goddamn mouth and say something.” Louis spit, surprising himself with the venom his voice was laced with. Timmy also seemed to be surprised, but he hid the expression as quickly as it had come. 

“I love you.” Timmy said, as if that explained anything.

“Which you already told me over the phone. Now get to the point.” Louis said, crossing his arms over his chest.

“That is the point, Louis. I love you, and I  _ miss _ you, and I need you to believe me.” He said.

Louis scoffed.

“Why the  _ hell _ would I believe that Timmy? What evidence do you have to prove that?” Louis said, throwing his hands into the air. Timmy went to open his mouth to speak again but Louis cut him off. “No, let  _ me _ talk. You let some random fucking  _ bimbo _ suck you off in  _ my  _ apartment. I broke up with you, and you never contacted me again! I know I broke up with you, but the least you could have done was try and get in contact with me to fucking apologize! Especially if you’re still so “in love” with me! I never got one single fucking word out of you until that party and the only reason you came up to me was because you got all fucking jealous over Harry.” Louis finished, breathing in a gulp of air once he was done. Timmy’s eyes softened, which was weird, because Louis doesn’t remember them ever doing that.

“You never gave me the chance, Louis. You blocked me on every social media, you blocked my phone number, you blocked my family’s numbers, you transferred out of our classes together, you had Liam with you  _ wherever  _ you went, and by the time you didn’t, I knew you wanted space. I knew you wanted nothing to do with me, and what was I supposed to do then, huh? I knew you wouldn’t listen to me because you were still mad at me and hated my guts and I knew you didn’t want to see me. I knew what you didn’t want was me, so,  _ because _ I still love you, I chose not to contact you because I knew that was what you needed.” Timmy rambled, trying to get everything out that he needed to. 

Louis didn’t know what to say. For as much as he hated Timmy for doing what he did, he had a point. Everything he was saying was true. He was right about everything he just said and Louis couldn’t do shit about it. Timmy also seemed so much, _ kinder _ . Something about the way he was just genuinely  _ talking  _ to Louis instead of yelling and jumping to conclusions and blaming him was so refreshing and it honestly warmed Louis’ heart a little bit. 

“I. You’re right.” Louis said, looking down at his hands in his lap.

“I know Louis. And I’m  _ sorry _ . I’m sorry about  _ everything _ . I didn’t mean for you to get so hurt. I  _ love _ you Louis.” Timmy said, and Louis just. He felt his heart break. He’s wanted to hear those words come from Timmy’s mouth so badly for so goddamn long, he didn’t know how much he had really needed them. Louis felt admiration stir up in his chest, and it was such a nice feeling. Maybe, maybe Timmy had changed. Maybe this was how Louis got to be happy. Maybe he  _ was _ still in love with Timmy, and maybe it didn’t have to be a bad thing. 

“Okay. Um, okay. I just. Why did you do it?” Louis asked, hesitantly looking up at Timmy’s face. He looked into the light brown eyes of the boy sitting in front of him, and for some reason, it just didn’t feel the same. Timmy looked confused.

“I already told you why I never said anything afterwards. You blocked m-” Timmy started but Louis quickly corrected him.

“No, not with that. Why did you, um. Why did you have Brittany suck you off? And why in my  _ goddamn _ house Timmy? Why?” Louis asked, desperation leaking into his voice. Timmy looked nervous for a millisecond, but quickly replaced it with a sweet smile that reminded Louis of the Timmy he fell for three years ago. 

“Honestly? I just. You were never there. You were so busy and distracted and I felt like you didn’t have time for  _ me _ anymore so when you were out that day I invited her over and one thing led to another and I didn’t stop her when I should have.” Timmy said, shrugging as if it were no big deal. As if he already knew he had Louis right where he wanted him, and he knew Louis was going to forgive him so his confession didn’t really matter.

Louis remembered the weeks leading up to the day he found the two of them in his bathroom. Jade’s girlfriend at the time, Leigh-Anne had tried killing herself and was in the hospital until after he and Timmy had broken up. Not only had that happened, but Louis’ mum had gotten diagnosed with Leukemia and Fizzy had gotten sick with a heart problem. Louis’ life had been completely flipped upside down, and then he came home from the hospital one day to find his boyfriend of two years getting sloppily sucked off in  _ his _ bathroom and it  _ destroyed _ him. 

“Leigh-Anne fucking  _ overdosed _ , that month Timmy. My family members were  _ dying _ . I was living my own personal  _ hell _ , and you have the nerve to call me crying saying “you still love me” and then tell me the reason you  _ fucking  _ cheated on me was because you felt deprived of attention?!” Louis all but screamed across the booth, absolutely drawing attention to the two of them if the sudden look on Timmy’s face was anything to go by. 

“Woah, woah, woah, calm down Louis. That’s not what I meant.” Timmy said, reaching across the table to grasp Louis’ hand in his. Louis allowed it.

“I cannot believe I ruined everything with Harry,  _ just _ to come down here and listen to your sorry ass talk about how my life being completely ruined freshmen year was an  _ inconvenience  _ to you.” Louis snapped, and Timmy’s face immediately turned into a scowl. He replaced it with a sweet smile right after.

“Come on baby, just calm down. I know I said that wrong but you  _ know _ what I mean. I’m sorry for everything I did. I need you. And I’m absolutely still in love with you and I think you’re still in love with me too. If you were so  _ invested  _ in this thing with  _ Styles _ ,” Timmy spit Harry’s name like it was poison. “Then you wouldn’t really be here, would you? I bet he doesn’t love you the way I did, does he? He can’t, can he? You know he can’t love you the way I love you. He can’t treat you better than I can either. The only thing that  _ prick _ is good for, is getting lost. I bet he couldn’t make you feel as good as I did either, huh? It’s pathetic. You deserve better than that baby, you do.”

Louis remembers a lot of things about his relationship with Timmy. He remembers falling in love with him so quickly he was blind with it. He remembers meeting his family. He remembers spending holidays with him. He remembers getting through Uni finals with him. He remembers introducing him to his friends. He remembers getting into fights with him, but then making up that same night. He remembers the way they used to make love. He remembers the names he used to use for him. 

Louis remembers falling in love with Timmy within the first month that they had been dating. He remembers telling Timmy as much, only to be laughed at and shrugged to the side. He remembers being told, “You don’t know anything about love yet. You will, but not yet. You move too fast for me.” He remembers having to wait six months to be told those three words back in a way where it was almost like a chore, like an afterthought. Like it wasn’t everything in the entire world to Louis at the time. Louis remembers being told he was only allowed to meet Timmy’s sister Hayley, and not his parents. He remembers being told it was because Timmy wasn’t sure if he was “serious” or not yet. Two years went by and he never met Timmy’s parents. Louis remembers being forgotten about on his twenty-third birthday, only to be given a Christmas present the next day that Louis had seen Timmy label “joint present” that morning as if it would make up for missing his birthday. Louis remembers Timmy coming home drunk for the last five minutes of New Years Eve to give Louis a sloppy kiss that Louis stole from him before passing out on the couch before the ball even dropped. Louis remembers being taken to a Halloween party and being so excited because they were finally celebrating a holiday  _ together _ , only to be left by himself the second he got there and to not see Timmy again until he was black out drunk at two in the morning in the backyard.

Louis remembers being so stressed out about his finals that he broke down in tears day after day and each time Timmy would brush it off and tell him it wasn’t that big of a deal and that if Louis ended up failing he could always just take the class again. Louis remembers introducing Timmy to Liam and Jade for the first time, only for Timmy to stay for five minutes, not speak at all, and then demand Louis go home with him. When Louis obliged and went home with him to ask him what the  _ fuck _ the attitude was for in the privacy of his home, he remembers being told how much Timmy didn’t like his friends and how he’d feel a lot better if Louis stopped hanging out with them. Louis remembers saying no and having Timmy ignore him for a week until Louis promised to set some boundaries with his best friends just so he could have his boyfriend back. Louis remembers getting into fights with Timmy about  _ everything _ , things as simple as what he was wearing, where he was going, who he was going with, what time he’d be home, what he brought for them to eat, why he couldn’t hang out, practically anything Louis did Louis remembers getting into a fight for. He remembers Timmy blaming everything on him. Saying he didn’t want to hang out with Louis because he did this or said that or had a tendency to do this. Saying that if Louis wasn’t so this or Louis wasn’t so that maybe Timmy would want him more. Louis remembers apologizing for every single thing Timmy found wrong with him and everything Timmy complained about, and  _ then _ some. Louis remembers always apologizing and promising to be better for Timmy, to be acknowledged for a minute, and then ignored for either hours, or maybe even days. 

Louis remembers when they used to be intimate with each other. Louis remembers the first time they had sex. Timmy had been drunk. Louis had been asleep. Louis had woken up in the middle of it and had gone along with it because every time he had tried to initiate something while Timmy was sober, he had always turned him down. Louis had wanted to be that way with Timmy for so long, but Timmy had never wanted it, so when he finally did, Louis let him take what he wanted. Timmy came in about two minutes, and Louis had barely even gotten hard. Louis remembers how sex was like for them after that. Timmy never remembered their first time. Louis remembered pretending not to care. Every time they had sex after that, it was always on Timmy’s terms. Louis remembers never asking for anything sexual, because Timmy said it was ugly to look like a whore and it made him want Louis even less. Louis remembers always just taking it whenever Timmy wanted to have sex with him. Can only count on one hand the amount of times where they had sex and he actually enjoyed it. Let alone came from it. Louis remembers being called a whore, an attention seeker, desperate, and lazy. 

What Louis cannot for the  _ life _ of him seem to remember though, is Timmy loving him. Louis also can’t seem to remember him treating him any other way besides like absolute shit. He can’t remember Timmy making him feel anywhere near  _ good _ , ever. And he also, sure as  _ hell _ , can’t remember him  _ ever  _ calling him baby. Louis asked him to, once. When they had first started dating and he was younger and stupid. Timmy had said, “I may be into dudes, but I’m not a fucking wet wipe. People who use names like that make me want to throw up. That was a dumb thing to ask for Louis.” and Louis never thought about it again. Not until Harry. Louis hadn’t even had to ask Harry to call him that, Harry had just wanted to. And once he saw how much Louis had  _ liked _ it? He kept doing it just because. 

Timmy was wrong about everything he just said, except for one thing.  _ Harry can’t love you the way I love you. _ He’s right. Harry can’t. Harry wouldn’t be caught  _ dead _ “loving” Louis the way Timmy did. Because Timmy  _ never _ loved Louis. All Harry has  _ ever _ done for Louis was care, protect, and pleasure Louis and all Timmy ever did to him was torture him and make him lose his mind. And not only did he absolutely kill him back then, he’s managed to make Louis fuck up,  _ once _ again. Because Louis had somebody like Harry Styles to come home to every day and he chose to think he was still in love with a piece of shit as big as Timmy? Louis couldn’t believe himself. 

Louis snatched his hand away from Timmy’s like the mere touch had burned his hand. It practically had. The comment about Harry not being able to make him feel as good as Timmy did, about him being pathetic, about Louis deserving  _ better _ , made Louis see red. There was  _ nobody _ better than Harry Styles. No one had  _ ever  _ made him feel as good as Harry Styles had made him feel. If anything, Louis is the pathetic one. He’s had  _ Harry _ treating him like he strung up the moon for him for months, and he chose to reject Harry for someone like the piece of  _ shit _ sitting across from him? Louis stood up and did something he would have never thought he could do. 

He struck Timmy right across his left cheek. The entire restaurant went silent, and Louis knew  _ everyone _ was looking at the two of them. Louis’ hand stung something fierce, but he didn’t even feel it. The pain was in the back of his mind. The only thing he was thinking about right now was Harry. And how big of a fucking idiot he’d been this entire time. 

Because Louis remembers Harry giving him a rose on his first, and  _ every _ , date. He remembers being able to take his time with Harry and not be pressured into anything he didn’t want to do. Louis remembers slow dancing in the park parking lot and kissing Harry under the stars and being asked to be his boyfriend. Louis remembers Harry calling him three times on his birthday,  _ just _ to serenade him and remind him he was being thought of. He remembers facetiming on Christmas so they could watch a movie together and fall asleep together on the phone. He remembers Harry buying him a $230 sweater he had mentioned  _ one _ single time. Louis remembers spending all of New Years Eve with Harry and making out with him for so long they didn’t even  _ notice _ the ball had dropped until it was twenty minutes past the time. Louis remembers going on museum dates and going to the art museum on Harry’s birthday. He remembers Harry being respectful everytime something got to be too much for Louis or something got too heated and they had to stop doing what they were doing. He remembers that even though he was constantly denying Harry after teasing him, Harry still  _ understood _ and didn’t  _ take _ from him what he wanted, because he wanted  _ Louis _ to want it. Louis remembers Harry stopping everything they were doing just to turn on his favorite Christmas movie to calm his nerves down and watched the movie with him even if he was half hard. Louis remembers getting hard as a fucking  _ rock _ every time Harry so much as  _ looked _ at him a certain way, let  _ alone  _ touched him. 

And Louis remembers Harry calling him things like baby, and love, and honey, and darling, and  _ Tiger _ and he’s just so obviously everything Louis wants and so obviously  _ not  _ Timmy that it’s fucking  _ hilarious _ that he didn’t realize it sooner. Louis’ been in love with Harry this entire time, but has been too hung up on the past and on shit that  _ doesn’t _ matter anymore that he couldn’t  _ let _ himself love him. 

“I love  _ Harry _ . I love the man that doesn’t treat me like shit, and then lie to my  _ face _ about it. I love the man that would never put his dick down some other bitches throat just because he’s cranky and lonely. I love the man that isn’t afraid to actually fucking  _ care _ about me and the fact that I almost fell for your bullshit,  _ again _ ? Is disgusting. I’m disgusted. Go fuck someone else over Timothy because I’m done with you. Is this closure enough for you? Don’t  _ ever _ fucking talk about Harry to me, or to  _ anyone _ ever again or else I will personally kick your arse for him.” Louis spit, grabbing his things off the table before he turned and stormed out of the diner. 

\---

Louis didn’t know what to expect with going back to Harry’s house. He didn’t know what was going to happen. Harry could scream at him, curse at him, kick him out, tell him that he completely changed his mind while he had time to think and Louis would understand one hundred percent. He would be absolutely, mortally crushed, but he would understand. Of course he would. He didn’t deserve Harry. He didn’t deserve Harry at all. But he was going to try. He would do whatever Harry wanted him to do if it meant he got a second chance. 

Harry might not even be home when he gets there. He wouldn’t be surprised if Harry went out to get his mind off of it, or went to talk to Niall or Zayn about it. He wouldn’t be surprised at all. And if he was gone, he would just have to decide whether to text him saying he was at his house, or he’d wait until Harry got home, or he’d leave and come back later, or. He’d figure something else out. Driving down Harry’s road, coming up near Louis’ normal parking spot, he didn’t know. He had absolutely no clue what was going to happen when he opened that door, but he just prayed to God that he didn’t fuck up too bad this time. 

After parking his car, Louis jumped out of it and practically ran into the building and up the stairs to Harry’s floor. When he made it to Harry’s door, he took a few minutes to compose himself, and noticed that he was wearing the cardigan sweater Harry had bought him for his birthday. He had completely forgotten he had chosen to wear it tonight and it hurt his heart even more that he made the love of his life watch him walk away to another man in the clothes he bought for Louis. But he was going to make it up to him. Somehow. He was going to make it up to him. 

Louis didn’t know if he should knock and see if Harry came and opened the door and then deal with the awkward hellos? Or maybe he’d just tell him as soon as he opened the door. But Louis didn’t want to tell Harry he loved him in the middle of the hallway where anyone could see. And who’s to say Harry would even actually open the door if he knocked? He has a peep hole, he’d see it was Louis outside and he might not even want to let him in. So he did the only thing his brain thought was reasonable. He knocked two quick little knocks, and turned the knob and walked in himself. Harry should really start locking his door. 

Louis walked into the apartment and closed the door behind him to see Harry sitting tensely on the couch. When Harry looked up to see Louis his eyes twinkled, albeit Louis could absolutely tell how sad he was. Harry stood up and looked like he was having an internal battle with himself on whether or not he should walk over to Louis. Harry went to open his mouth but Louis said,

“I’m in love with you.” and that effectively shut Harry’s mouth. Or, well, it didn’t shut, it just kind of hung open, but he didn’t say anything, which was what Louis had wanted. “And listen, I am literally so fucking in love with you. I’m just an idiot!” Louis threw his hands in the air like it all made sense. “I was a scared, dumb, stupid idiot who was way too obsessed with the fact that my abusive ex boyfriend never told me he was sorry. But I went to see him and he just lied out of his arse the whole time and he sat in _ our _ booth at the diner and talked about how he was lonely and sad and  _ that’s  _ why he cheated on me when  _ my  _ life had been falling apart and then!  _ Then  _ he was like, ‘oh, Harry can’t love you the way I can’ and ‘Harry can’t make you feel the way I can’ and he called me  _ baby  _ which he used to make fun of me for and everything seemed so wrong because everything he was  _ saying _ was wrong and I kept thinking about how much different it’d be if it were you sitting across from me and I just.  _ You  _ make me happy.  _ You  _ make me feel safe.  _ You’ve  _ made me the happiest I’ve  _ ever _ been. And I love  _ you _ .” Louis was practically panting by the time he was done with his confession, but it was absolutely worth it if the look on Harry’s face was anything to go by. Harry was so obviously trying to contain one of his face splitting grins, and was failing tremendously, before he finally walked up to Louis and grabbed his face and smashed their lips together. 

It wasn’t a great kiss. Their teeth clinked together and it was much too harsh but it portrayed exactly how they both felt and to Louis it was fucking  _ perfect _ because the only thing he’d wanted all day was Harry’s lips on his. Louis grabbed the belt loops of the jeans Harry was wearing and pulled him closer so they were lined up chest to chest, knees to knees, every part of the front of their bodies touching. Louis loved every second of it. Harry leaned their foreheads together.

“I’ve wanted to tell you how much I love you since that night we danced together at the park.” Harry whispered, looking into Louis’ eyes. Green is a much better color than brown Louis decided at that moment.

“We didn’t even start dating until after that night, Harold.” Louis said, rubbing his thumbs against the sliver of skin he could reach above Harry’s pants line.

“Didn’t matter. The second you agreed to dance with me in a parking lot at eleven o’clock at night to an Ed Sheeran song the both of us loved was the moment I knew I was in love with you.” Harry said, leaning down to kiss Louis again, this time much softer and slower. Louis pulled away.

“I’m so sorry it took me this long to pull my head out of my arse. I’ve been the worst boyfriend you could ever have Haz. You don’t deserve to be treated the way I treated you.” Louis said, tears building in the corners of his eyes. He laid his head against Harry’s chest, so glad to be this close again but so upset with himself because he knew he didn’t deserve it.

“What do you mean baby? I don’t deserve honesty? I don’t deserve to be happy?” Harry asked, and Louis shot his head up because no. That’s not what he had said. 

“What? Of course you do. But I didn’t mean that. I meant-” 

“I know what you meant, Lou. I’m saying you’re wrong.” Harry said, thumbing at Louis’ cheekbones. 

“I’m wrong? No, I am not wrong,  _ you  _ are wrong mister,” Louis began to pull away from the taller man but Harry was not having it. 

“Settle, baby.” Harry whispered as he pulled Louis back into him. And, well, Louis wasn’t going to say no. “You’ve made me so happy Louis. You’ve made me happier than anybody else ever has. And all you ever did to me was be honest. You were honest when something was bothering you and when you didn’t like something that was happening. You were honest when something big happened that would have torn us apart if you had gone about it a different way. You came to me about it, and you were honest. And I love you for that. Now if you’re going to tell me that I don’t deserve to be the happiest I’ve ever been with a man that’s always honest and  _ loves _ me? Then I really don’t know what to say to you.” Harry smirked when he finished what he had to say, because he knew Louis would have absolutely no rebuttal. And he didn’t. He just pouted and shoved his face into Harry’s neck. 

“Okay. You win. But I’m still sorry.” Louis said, placing a kiss where Harry’s shoulder meets his neck. 

“I know you are baby. But it’s okay.” Harry said, enjoying the feel of his Louis’ lips on his skin again. He hadn’t had Louis in a position like this in  _ weeks _ , and he’s spent the last three hours thinking he was never going to have it ever again, so to say he’s relieved and basking in the glow right now would be an understatement. He slowly began walking the two of them backwards towards the wall that was directly behind Louis. “You know what you could do to make it up to me though?” Harry asked, just for the sake of being an absolute shithead. Louis perked up in an instant. 

“What? I’ll do it.” He said, looking up at Harry with those eyes that made Harry want to do stupid shit like buy a ring.

“You could always say it some more.” Harry muttered, having the decency to be at least a little shy. 

“ ‘Say it some more’? Say what some mor--, oh.” Louis was confused for a moment, but he soon realized what Harry wanted. Louis felt his back make contact with the wall behind him and he used the leverage it gave him to lean up into Harry’s ear and whisper, “I love you” before placing a kiss right behind the man’s ear. 

“Say it again.” 

Louis grinned.

“I love you, Harry.” Louis said, louder this time, and began sucking a love bite into the sensitive skin under Harry’s ear. Harry let out a small moan as his hands now wrapped around Louis’ waist tightened and caused the older man to smirk. Louis’ hands were wrapped around Harry’s shoulders as he sucked on that spot on Harry’s neck to make it as dark as possible. Louis had only left a few marks on Harry before, maybe one or two, and they were always little and always faint, because that had been another thing Timmy hadn’t liked for him to do, but Timmy didn’t fucking matter anymore and Louis thought it was the hottest fucking thing for Harry to be marked up all because of him and Harry seemed to like it just as much as he did so he went for it. 

He bit into the skin of Harry’s neck, making the man hiss before he quickly soothed over it with his tongue. Louis leaned back to admire his work and smiled. 

“I love you.” He said, before kissing the mark he had made on Harry’s neck and then leaning up to kiss the man he had planted it on. Harry immediately licked into Louis’ mouth, and Louis sucked on Harry’s tongue before nipping at it playfully. Harry moaned and pushed Louis up against the wall just a little harder than before and Louis suddenly felt himself starting to get  _ more _ than a little interested in what was happening. So Louis took his hands and placed them on Harry’s that were on his hips, all without dislodging his lips from Harry’s mind you, and moved them so that they were placed over the expanse of his arse cheeks. 

Harry’s eyebrows shot up and his eyes shot open and he leaned back, without taking his hands off his arse, to look at Louis in the eyes.

“You sure baby? We don’t have to do anything like that.” Harry said, searching Louis’ face for any discomfort. But this time, there wasn’t any. And there wasn’t  _ going _ to be any either. Louis was positive. 

“Who says just because you get to touch my arse you’re making it all the way to home base, huh rock star? What if I just want you to touch my butt?” Louis asks, just for the sole purpose of being a brat. Harry growls and leans in to bite at Louis’ mouth.

“I can touch your butt all you want me to touch it, if that’s what you really want baby.” Harry said, kissing Louis hotly for a few seconds. Louis pulls away to laugh.

“Seriously, Haz. I’m sure. I’ve never been more sure of anything.” Louis says, and kisses Harry sweetly to prove his point. Harry smiled.

“I love you Lou.”

“I know.” Louis said, before placing his hands over Harry’s again, only squeezing this time with a playful glint in his eyes. Harry was going to wreck him. 

His mouth was back on Louis’ in a second, and suddenly, Louis couldn’t breathe properly. Thinking straight was absolutely out of the question. Harry’s ginormous fucking hands were now squeezing at his arse with a vigor he didn’t know the man even possessed, but, he did have to give the guy some credit. It’s been months without sex. Louis can’t believe he’s gone a year and a half without somebody up his arse, and he’s known (roughly) how big Harry is for months! He’s such a fucking idiot. Harry is licking the inside of his mouth like he wants to memorize every nook and cranny of it, and hey, maybe he does. Lord knows Louis wants to memorize everything about Harry. Suddenly, he's being lifted off the ground to make room for Harry’s thigh in between his and Louis can't help but moan at the  _ amazing _ friction on his  _ incredibly  _ interested length. 

“Somebody’s excited, huh baby?” Harry asks all wet and hot in Louis’ ear and Louis almost passes out. If Harry is one of those people that talks all nice and smooth and dirty during sex, which Louis just  _ knows  _ he is, Louis might not even make it to the main course. Louis can’t help but rut against Harry’s leg a little bit. 

With Harry’s constant squeezing of his arse cheeks over his jeans, it makes him rock forward and Harry’s leg is so damn  _ firm _ that Louis can’t just not grind down a little harder than he probably should. Louis thinks he’s getting away with it until Harry opens his mouth. 

“You can ride my thigh if you need to baby. I won’t mind.” Harry says, licking and biting Louis’ left ear lobe. Louis whines high in his throat at the comment and can’t even find it in himself to be embarrassed. “You want to, don’t you? Come on baby, grind against it.” Harry accentuates his comment by thrusting his thigh against  _ Louis _ the same time he brings Louis against  _ him _ , which makes Louis cry out and throw his head back. Louis was now definitely riding Harry’s thigh against the wall in his living room and it’s the hottest thing he’s ever done in his entire life. Harry just  _ never _ stops talking either, which makes everything so much better.

“You look so fucking good in this sweater. Almost broke my heart knowing he got to see you in it more than I did. But look at you now, huh? Yeah, you’re about to cum in your pants and make a mess of the sweater I bought you all because I’ve got you sitting on my leg.” Harry said, pushing up into Louis as Louis ground down onto him. 

“Fuck, Harry.” Louis said, chest feeling like it was caving in because of how hard he was breathing. He’s never been this turned on in his life. He’s never felt this  _ good _ in his life, and he’s had plenty of actual sex before.

“Yeah, you feel good Lou? You like this?” Harry asked, sounding just as affected as Louis, thank god. Louis wished he could be doing more to help with Harry’s own arousal but he could barely focus on remembering to breathe. All he could do was let out another whine and nod his head yes. Harry grunted in response.

“Yeah, I know you do. You’ve got me so fucking hard baby, can you feel me?” Harry asked, repositioning himself so that his entire length was pressed up against Louis’ hip, and the older man moaned at the feeling. “That’s all for you Lou. How does it feel, knowing you did that to me?” Louis was panting with his eyes glossed over at this point.

“I-I. Hot. It’s so hot Harry. Wanna feel you.” Louis said, hoping it made sense to Harry, which of course it did, because Harry always understands what he wants. What he needs. 

“Yeah? You wanna feel me baby? Want to touch me?” Harry said, gripping under Louis’ arse and picking him up with practice ease. Louis hit head on the wall behind him with a groan not only at the friction his cock was now getting against Harry’s firm torso, but also at the sheer show of pure strength this man just demonstrated by picking him up like he weighed absolutely nothing. It had Louis leaking in his jeans. Nodding his head Harry wasted no time getting them both to what was presumably the younger man's bedroom. Louis couldn’t be bothered to pay attention to his surroundings right now, being too caught up in the marks he was leaving Harry’s skin. “Tell me.” Harry growled in Louis' ear and it sent a shiver down his spine. Louis shivered at the noise. 

“I wanna touch you. I wanna feel your abs and your nipples and your arms and just. Everything. I want your cock. I wanna suck you.” Louis said, whispering the last part into Harry’s ear. Harry groaned into Louis’ neck as they finally made it to Harry’s bedroom. He walked over to the bed and slowly laid Louis out on the sheets. Louis sat up on his elbows to watch the younger man strip his shirt off and next his jeans, biting his lip as he openly admired his boyfriend. 

Harry knelt on the edge of the bed and let Louis crawl up to him to touch as he pleased, knowing this was what Louis wanted, what he needed. Louis sat on his calves, and ran his hands across the defined but not bulky set of abs Harry proudly sported. He traced his finger along Harry’s v-line, teasing the man as he ran his finger across the band of his boxers without actually touching anything below the elastic. He then ran his fingers lightly over Harry’s nipples, which immediately perked up into tiny buds. Louis looked up at Harry and grinned a devilish grin before looking back down at Harry torso and licking a fat stripe up the center of his abdomen. Harry hummed, and threading his fingers through Louis’ hair. 

It was getting harder and harder for Louis to ignore the  _ huge _ bulge sitting right in front of his face. He could smell the musk of Harry and it was making him dizzy with how much he wanted it in his mouth. So deciding to be an absolute tease, Louis made sure Harry was looking directly at him, as if he’d been looking anywhere else since Louis’ walked into his house, and mouthed at the tip of Harry’s cock through the grey boxers, trying to get him as wet as possible through the fabric. Harry let out a moan that made Louis twitch in his trousers. Louis mouthed up and down Harry’s entire length outside of the boxers, and was having the time of his life. Harry was also having the time of his life. He had the  _ love  _ of his life finally comfortable enough to get intimate with him and the only thing he’s asked for was to touch Harry. Harry would die a happy man. And Louis may be a tease, but this is the best thing Harry’s felt in his entire life.

“Hmm, so nice baby. You look so good kissing my cock. You wanna take it out? Get it all nice and wet?” Harry asked, running his fingers through Louis’ hair, causing Louis’ eyes to flutter closed. Louis hummed against Harry’s cock, which caused Harry to jerk in his place and push his dick into Louis’ mouth through the fabric. That seemed to get the message across to the older man because then Louis was grabbing ahold of the elastic waistband of Harry’s pants and pulling them down so they pooled around Harry knees, and Louis swore to God he was drooling. 

Harry’s cock was the  _ hottest  _ thing he had  _ ever _ seen. It was so long, and  _ just  _ girthy enough he knew it would stretch him perfectly and he couldn’t help the little whine that slipped out as he looked at it. Harry laughed as he rubbed the side of Louis’ face.

“You like that baby? You like my cock? It’s all for you Lou. Whenever you want it you can have it.” Harry said, slyly pushing his hips forward to rub the tip of himself against Louis’ lips. Louis reached a hand up to grab ahold of Harry’s base, Harry hissing at the sensitivity. Louis stuck out his tongue to kitten lick at the tip, gathering the precum that rested there and swallowed it up. The sight made Harry groan and throw his head back. He didn’t let his eyes wander from Louis for long though, because soon he felt Louis take the tip of him into his mouth, and getting head from Louis was not something Harry was willing to miss out on seeing.

Louis loved the weight of Harry in his mouth. It’d been so long since he’d had a cock in his mouth, and God he missed it. But nobody’s dick Louis’ had in his mouth will ever be able to compare to the one he’s got in it currently. Harry is hot and heavy on Louis’ tongue, and he’s got this thick ass vein on the underside of him. It might just be how fucking  _ horny _ Louis is right now, but he thinks, if he concentrates hard enough, that he can feel Harry’s pulse through his cock. Louis’ got about half of Harry in his mouth and he’s already close to the back of Louis’ throat. Back in the day, Louis was an absolute champ at deepthroating, could get guys to cum literal buckets with his nose pressed to their stomachs, but Louis hasn’t done that in a long time and Harry’s enormous cock is not one you just go choking on right away. So Louis just wanked his hand over the places his mouth couldn’t quite reach yet. 

Louis sucked one long suck up to the tip of Harry’s shaft, before licking around the tip, getting spit all over Harry. Louis wet his hand with his own saliva and rubbed Harry up and down once, twice, three times before putting his mouth back on him. 

“Fuck, Lou. Your mouth is perfect, baby. Keep sucking,  _ yeah _ . Just like that, you’re so good at that, aren’t you?” Harry groaned, hands lightly gripping Louis’ hair. Somewhere deep in Louis’ chest, he wished Harry would grip much  _ much  _ harder on the strands of hair in his hands, but that’s a conversation for another day. Louis moaned as he really went to work, bobbing his head up and down on Harry’s length, effectively making a mess of not only Harry’s cock, but of his own face. He could feel the spit coming out from the corners of his mouth, could feel it running down his chin, but one look into Harry’s eyes with his mouth stuffed full of Harry’s cock, he could tell Harry looked like he was going to fucking  _ devour _ him, and he couldn’t care less about the spit. “You look so good like this baby, mouth full of my cock. You love this, don’t you?” Harry asked, and for some reason Louis just knew he was expecting an answer this time. Louis nodded his head around Harry’s dick, not wanting to stop what he was doing for even a second. 

Harry was flushed all the way down from his neck to the middle of his chest, he was breathing harder than Louis had ever seen him before and he kept letting out little grunts as Louis moved his head over his length. At this rate, Louis would get off just by making Harry cum. “Look at that, you can’t even take your mouth off of me for a second. That’s so fucking hot, Louis, fuck.” Harry’s eyes threatened to close, but Louis wanted them on him. He wanted Harry to watch, so Louis slowly started to take more of Harry into his throat, feeling him hit the back of it and gagging as he did so. But he didn’t stop, he stayed there and let his throat convulse around Harry’s cock, drinking in the moan Harry let out. He knew Harry felt good like this, ke knew it. But Louis was frustrated. He’s treated Harry like shit and sex is an awful was of apologiaing but Louis just wanted to know how good he could feel. He wanted all of Harry in his throat, and it was frustrating him. 

“Baby, fuck, you’re so good. I’m so close, you gotta stop Tiger.” Harry said, grabbing Louis’ hair and slowly pulling Louis off his dick. But Louis didn’t want to stop. He knew what he wanted and he wanted to make Harry cum. He wanted to get all of Harry in his mouth and he wanted to make him shoot straight down the back of his throat. 

Louis whined the second Harry was out of his mouth; loud and bratty and something he totally did not know he could do but Harry’s eyes darkened and he looked five seconds away from wrecking Louis so it was definitely now his new favorite sound. “What do you need, baby? Huh? What else do you need?” Harry asked, rubbing Louis’ face with the palm of his hand. Louis leaned into the palm, rubbing his cheek against it. 

Louis was panting. The fact that Harry was completely naked, having taken the boxers all the way off, and Louis was still fully clothed, it did something to Louis he couldn’t explain. He was so overwhelmed right now. He didn’t even know if he’d be able to speak and form coherent sentences in a way Harry could actually understand. But Harry  _ would  _ understand because he always understands. 

“I wanna make you cum. I need to get all of you in and I want you to cum down my throat.” Louis said as he looked up at Harry through his eyelashes. Louis’ tongue was practically hanging out of his mouth as he waited for Harry to put his cock back in. Louis knew Harry would give him what he needs. He knew he would. Harry sucked in a breath and leaned down to kiss Louis senseless, as if he wasn’t already.

“God  _ damn _ Louis. You’ve already got me about to cum just from your dirty little mouth. You want me to cum down your throat? Is that what you need, baby?” Harry asked, leaning back up and taking his cock in his hand, leading it to Louis’ mouth which was open and more than ready.

Harry slapped his cock against Louis’ tongue a few times to tease him, shuddering as the whine Louis let out sent tingles down his spine. 

“You need all of me in your throat Lou? Is that what you need? You need me to help you get all of my cock in your pretty mouth?” Harry asked, rubbing the tip of himself against Louis’ cheek. Louis groaned.

“ _ Yes _ . Please, Harry. Please, please, please.” Louis begged. Louis was on his knees begging for Harry to stick his entire cock down his throat and Harry felt like he was going to pass out. Harry, of course, listened to the love of his life and slowly fed Louis his cock. Inch by inch, Louis took it like a champ until about three/fourths of the way down he started to gag like before. Harry pulled back out slowly before thrusting back in.

“Settle. Open up for me Tiger.” Harry said, slowly pushing his cock back into the warmth of Louis’ throat. Each time they repeated this, they managed to get Harry a little farther in. 

They worked at it for awhile, and by the time Louis was pressing his nose to Harry’s neatly trimmed pubic hair, he was rubbing himself through his jeans. He’d never been this worked up before. Ever. The zipper was cutting into his skin where he was pressing it against himself but he couldn’t care less about it. Louis was shamelessly grinding against his own hand as Harry’s hands held his head against his stomach and the second Harry noticed what was happening the moan he let out had Louis leaking even more precum into his boxers. He was soaking wet already and he hadn’t even cum yet. Harry decided to go back to fucking Louis’ mouth, thrusting in and out.

“Fuck Louis. You couldn’t even wait for me to get your clothes off, huh? You’re so desperate and needy for my cum you’re humping your own hand. Are you gonna cum baby? Yeah? You gonna cum?” Louis tried nodding his head but his mouth was too full of Harry so all that came out was a garbled hum around Harry’s cock. “Mmm, you feel so good. Fuck, fuck, fuck. I’m gonna cum Lou. You need it? Is this what you need? You need me to cum deep down your throat in order for you to get off?” Harry rambled, fucking in and out of Louis’ mouth in a quicker, but not too rough pace. Harry was letting out constant grunts as he slid in and out of Louis’ mouth. The noises that were being produced from all the saliva and Louis’ throat were noises that Louis had half the shame to be embarrassed about, but then he’d push into his hand again and forget why he’d even cared in the first place. “Uh, uh, uh, I’m cumming baby,  _ fuck _ .” Harry said before bringing Louis’ face all the way back down on his cock, shoving Louis’ nose into his tummy and shooting off down the back of Louis’ throat. They both moaned at the feeling. Louis was rubbing furiously at his cock now and all he needed was one tiny little push, and he’d be there. 

“Cum Louis. Cum in your trousers because you got your mouth full of my cum. Do it, baby, you know you want to. Come on, be good for me and let me see you cum.” And that was it. Louis was jerking even farther into Harry’s hold, and cumming all over his boxers and effectively leaking straight through to his jeans from how wet he’d already been. Harry pulled Louis off of his cock, beaming at the fact that Louis didn’t even splutter or cough when he was pulled off, just sucked in a big gulp of air and managed to look even more blissed out than Harry felt. 

Harry immediately wrapped Louis up in his arms and pulled him on top of him on the bed. Louis voice was shot all to hell when he said,

“I still want you to fuck me.” and Louis definitely blushed as he heard the fucked out mess that was his voice right now. Harry’s cock perked up a bit at the request, but Harry needed to change the mood of this if he was going to fuck Louis. He didn’t want to be rough and crazy with Louis the first time they had sex. He wasn’t about to fuck something up he’s worked so hard to obtain the trust for. 

“Patience, baby. We’ve got all night.” Harry said, brushing the fringe out of Louis’ eyes as he lay on top of him. “Let’s get you out of these clothes first.” 

Harry leaned up to kiss Louis, and grasped the side of his face with his hand. It was a sweet kiss, a slow kiss. Harry moaned as he tasted himself on Louis’ tongue. 

“You taste good Tiger.” Harry winked, and Louis shoved his face into Harry’s neck. Harry chuckled as he sat up, keeping Louis nicely sat in his lap. Harry began undoing the buttons of the cardigan and helped Louis take it off, carefully folding it and actually putting it somewhere because “It’s fucking expensive Harold”. Helping Louis get rid of the rest of his clothes was easy enough, until it came to Louis’ boxers. 

Harry was already half hard again just from finally seeing so much of the caramel colored skin he’s fantasized so much about already. Harry grabbed ahold of the waistband of the black boxers and was  _ so _ ready to pull them down but then he felt Louis’ hands shootout and that familiar reaction of Louis becoming way too tense hit Harry in the face. Harry’s heart plummeted. They had already made it so far tonight, and he had been given the best blowjob he’s ever received by the love of his life, so he really had nothing to complain about, but Harry wanted nothing more than to make Louis feel good. He wanted to make Louis cum on his fingers and then on his cock, and then maybe on his mouth, fuck.. He wanted to take so long and open him up so well that Louis was in tears by the time Harry got his cock inside of him. He wanted to proper make love to him.

“Louis? Are you alright? Do you want me to stop?” Harry asked, gently rubbing the tight skin of his belly to distract him from where his hands had  _ been _ going. Immediately Louis was shaking his head no, whining high in his throat.

“No! Please don’t stop. I need you to fuck me Haz. I need it.” Louis said, arching off the bed with his desperation. Harry breathed a sigh of relief. The last thing he needed was to find out he had done something to fuck everything up and make Louis uncomfortable again.

“Alright baby, I won’t stop. I promise. But what’s wrong? Why’d you tense up like that honey?” Harry asked, slowly rubbing lower on his stomach to work him back into the idea of taking his boxers off. Louis blushed. Not only did he blush, but he also closed his eyes and turned his head to try and burrow into the pillows underneath him. “Hey,” Harry said, leaning up and forcing Louis to look at him. “None of that, no hiding. What’s got you all flustered baby?”

“I’m a mess.” Louis said. “Down there, I mean. It’s messy and gross.” 

Harry just breathed a sigh of relief and smiled before kissing Louis on the lips. 

“Then I’ll just clean you up. Simple.” Louis had to control his jaw from dropping at Harry’s words as the younger man made his way back down to Louis’ boxers. Looking up at Louis’ now extra wide eyes, he made sure there was no ounce of hesitation on Louis’ part, and when he found none, he slowly worked the soiled boxers down Louis’ legs. 

Louis was  _ beautiful _ . He was right, he was a mess, but it made Harry’s cock start to fatten up quicker than it ever had before after round one with somebody. But Harry honestly isn’t surprised, Louis is definitely not like everyone else. Louis had cum covering his cock and all of his pubiv hair. Some of it was on his hips even, and the thing that really got Harry was there was just  _ so much _ of it. 

“ _ Baby _ , you got this wet just from sucking me? You needed it  _ that _ bad?” Harry asked, running his hands up and down Louis’ quivering thighs. Louis nodded and whimpered, his cock starting to perk back up all covered in his own cum. Harry wanted to eat him. So he did. He started at Louis’ hips, licking up the cum there, working his way to the other side. Harry wanted to clean everywhere that wasn’t Louis’ cock, he was saving the best for last. He even cleaned Louis pubes, which should have been weird, but it really wasn’t. And now, looking at Louis cock basically full mast, he wanted to get on his knees and pray and thank the great Lord for whatever he did to deserve this moment in time. Louis was definitely nowhere near as big as Harry, was a little on the smaller side, maybe five inches? But he was quite thick, and he was just the prettiest thing Harry has  _ ever _ seen and he sucked Louis’ shaft down in one go with no warning and he probably should’ve expected Louis’ hips to buck up so hard he’d rock Harry’s head back with the force of it, but. Things happen sometimes. 

Harry just giggled with a mouthful of Louis and lightly placed his hands on Louis’ hips as a reminder to not do that anymore. If Louis really wanted to buck up into his mouth though, Harry would let him do so in a heartbeat. Harry had to remind himself that the point of this was not to give Louis a blowjob and make him cum again, but to get him clean and ready. So, Harry sucked the last of the cum off of Louis’ shaft before letting go of him with a tight ‘pop’. 

“Fuck, Harry.” Louis said, chest heaving. Louis’ hair was matted to his forehead and he was flushed a pretty shade of pink all the way down to his chest and Harry had never seen something so utterly  _ perfect _ in his whole life. Harry pressed an open mouthed kiss on the skin where his thigh meets hip, sucking the skin into his mouth. Biting down on the skin, Harry drank up the cry that left Louis’ mouth and how Louis arched his back to get more. Harry soothed over the mark with his teeth, blowing cold air on the dark spot he created. Louis’ hips twitched at the attention. 

Harry worked his way up Louis’ torso, leaving mark after mark in his wake. He didn’t want to seem possessive, but something about seeing Louis covered in the marks Harry made on him, especially after wallowing in his own self pity at the idea of  _ losing _ him to somebody like Timothy fucking Warner for three whole hours, settled something deep inside of Harry he didin’t realize was raging away. Harry was muttering praises the entire time he explored Louis' body, worshipping the man’s hips, his tummy, tickling down his sides and telling him how pretty he was. Harry made it to Louis’ nipples and kitten licked at one of the already rock hard buds and Louis gasped as he arched his back into Harry.

“Sensitive spot, huh?” Harry grinned, looking up at Louis. Louis blushed and nodded his head. “Love that they’re sensitive Lou. I’m gonna play with them all the time.” Harry attached his mouth to Louis’ chest and the older man moaned, canting his hips up into Harry’s as the man sucked and nibbled on his nipple. One of Harry’s hands came down to Louis’ hips to slow him down, the other coming up to Louis’ other nipple, pinching and twisting the bud between two of his fingers. Louis whined high in his throat and thrashed his head back and forth on Harry’s pillows. Harry removed his mouth from the man’s nipple, inspecting the now puffy and red bud, smirking as Louis gasped when he blew cold air onto it.

“I bet you’d like that, wouldn’t you baby? Me playing with your pretty little nipples all the time? Getting you all worked up just from a few pinches? I bet you’d be able to cum just from that, wouldn’t you?” Harry said, now rolling both of them in between his fingers just to watch how Louis squirmed.

“Nngg,  _ yes _ . Yes, please, fuck.” Louis moaned, rocking his hips up in search of friction to his poor cock. Harry smiled.

“You’re perfect Louis. So fucking perfect. So pretty too. I love you so much. I’m gonna make you feel so good baby, okay?” Harry whispered, pressing kisses on to Louis’ now very sore chest. Louis just nodded his head and pulled Harry up for a kiss. 

Louis spread his legs to accommodate Harry to lay in between them, smiling into the kiss as the two of them lined up together perfectly. Harry moaned as he let himself slip against Louis’ own length, the wetness from the two of them combined made the slide of their cocks even better, and Harry couldn’t help but grind down a little bit. Louis gasped into Harry’s mouth, looking at the younger man through hooded eyes.

“Can you feel me baby? You’ve got me so worked up again, just from touching you. You’re so beautiful Lou.” Harry said, kissing down Louis’ jaw and neck, continuing to rub their lengths together. 

“More, Harry. Do something, please.” Louis said, grinding up into Harry and moaning at the beautiful friction he was receiving. 

“Yeah, what do you want baby? Anything.” Harry said, reaching in between them to wrap a hand around Louis. 

“Shit, Harry. Fuck me. I want you to fuck me, please.” Louis cried, thrusting up into Harry’s hand. Harry continued his assault against Louis’ neck as he gave Louis’ cock it’s much needed attention also. 

“Yeah, I can do that. I’ll do whatever you need, baby.” Harry said, pressing a kiss to Louis’ mouth. Harry let go of Louis’ length and reached over to his nightstand and pulled out the lube and a condom, placing them back on the bed. “Settle, Lou.” Harry said as Louis began to get restless on his sheets. Harry hadn’t yet failed to notice how every time he said those words Louis melted like butter wherever he stood, but he figured that was a conversation for another day. 

Leaning back over Louis, Harry used one arm to hold him up as the other pushed the fringe out of Louis’ eyes. His eyes were such a dark blue that they looked almost black in the low light of Harry’s bedroom, and Louis was looking at him like he wanted to bite him. It was a look Harry couldn’t wait to see more of. 

“How do you want to do this Lou?” Harry asked, rubbing Louis’ cheek with his thumb.

“Like this. Wanna see you. Just hurry up with it already, Harry.” Louis whined, turning his head to press a kiss against Harry’s hand. Harry chuckled. He leaned down to lick at the shell of Louis’ ear.

“No, Lou. I’m gonna take my time with you. Gonna make you feel so good. You want that? Want my fingers in you, rubbing you all over? Is that what you need, baby?” Harry smirked as he sped up the pace on Louis’ cock. Louis threw his head back.

“Nngh, Harry!” Louis arched his back to get closer to the man on top of him. “I need it. Please, I need it so bad.” 

At this point Harry was fully hard, leaking, and throbbing from how much he wanted the man underneath him. 

“Okay baby, I’ve got you.” Harry said as he grabbed the lube from the side of Louis’ head. He only slicked up two fingers at first, planning to go slow and not wanting the oil on the third finger to dry up. 

Harry lowered his entire body against Louis’ smaller one and reached a hand behind Louis to tease around the man’s entrance. Louis let out a gasp and wrapped his arms around Harry’s neck. Harry just rubbed around the pert muscle, getting the lube to slide into it but never actually breaching it. 

“Harry  _ please _ , please do something.” Louis sobbed, and Harry could never deny the man of anything even if he wanted to, so he slowly slid one finger in. Louis’ eyes scrunched up in obvious pain and not pleasure and Harry stopped immediately. “Louis? Baby? Are you okay?” Harry asked, going to remove his finger from Louis’ arse.

“No, no, don’t stop. Just been a really long time.” Louis said, immediately blushing at the confession. Harry smiled, relieved for the second time that night that this really  _ was _ something that Louis wanted to do. Harry continued to slowly move his finger around inside Louis as he spoke to get the man’s mind off of it. “Been awhile, hmm?” Harry asked, as if he hadn’t  _ literally _ just heard the answer to that question. But of course Louis was going to answer. 

“Yes. ‘S been so long Haz.” Louis answered, wiggling his arse against the one finger Harry had inside of him. Harry tried to contain his smirk, but Louis had seen it. He didn’t have it in him to call him out on it though, because he was far too interested in what he  _ did _ have in him and how close it was to his prostate. 

Harry must have also known, because the movements his finger was making were bypassing the little nub by just enough to drive Louis crazy. It felt so good. So much better than Louis’ pathetic attempts at getting himself off anally, and much better than anybody Louis’ ever been with, and he hasn’t even fucked Harry yet. 

“More, Haz,  _ please _ .” Louis begged, now moving back against Harry’s finger. Harry complied and added a second finger. Louis moaned at the stretch, forgetting how good getting properly fingered could feel. Although Louis definitely felt good, it was obvious he was going to need a lot of stretching, especially with Harry’s monster cock that only seemed to be getting harder the closer they got to the main event. 

“Mmm, so tight Tiger. Don’t you finger yourself, baby?” Harry asked, twisting his fingers to stretch Louis and reach every spot inside of him.

“I feel awkward doing it,” Louis said in between pants, trying to form an actual sentence with two of Harry’s fingers shoved inside of him. “M fingers are t-too short, too. Can never reach anything and it never feels good.” Louis was not about to tell Harry about the only time he’s been able to cum by fingering himself was two weeks ago when he had taken Harry’s sweater and was so overwhelmed by the smell of him that it got him so hard he couldn’t think straight and had ended up fucking himself with three, almost four fingers and had came twice. All over the sweater. Nope. Never going to tell him that. 

“Mmm what a shame, honey.” Harry said as he slowly slid in a third finger, letting them sit there for a moment so Louis could adjust. Louis was breathing like he’d just ran a marathon, and Harry was subconsciously worried about the man underneath him, but he’d also never seen Louis so blissed out before so he wasn’t all that worried about it. Louis choked on a gasp as he felt the third finger be pushed inside him and he should probably be concerned about how much he had to think about remembering how to breathe. 

“Feels so good Harry, fuck. Don’t stop.” Louis breathed, grinding his hips down into the mattress and onto Harry’s thick fingers. Harry chose that moment to finally crook all three of his fingers over that tiny nub inside Louis and Louis let out a scream. “AH, ah, ah, Harry, Haz. Please, hurry the fuck up, Jesus.” But Louis definitely didn’t  _ look _ like he wanted Harry to hurry up. He looked like he was proper enjoying it, and Harry was not about to stop that.

“How long’s it been baby? Since you’ve had something up your arse?” Harry asked, fucking his fingers in and out of Louis at a more rapid pace now, one hand holding Louis’ hips down so he didn’t fly off the bed. 

“Ung, a c-couple of,  _ fuck _ , a couple of months Haz.” Louis said, gripping Harry’s bedsheets with one hand while the other came down to wrap a hand around himself. Harry debated on denying Louis of that, but all Harry wanted was for Louis to feel good, so he let it continue. 

Louis had been thrashing around and moaning on Harry’s bed since they started this, so Harry kicked into overdrive. He drove his fingers in and out of Louis at an almost brutal pace, hitting his prostate on every other stroke, and began murmuring into Louis’ ear.

“A couple of months? Jesus, that’s why you’re so tight, huh? What did you think of the last time you fucked yourself? What made you cum baby?” Louis’ face grew red. He and Harry both knew the answer but Louis was almost too shy to say it.

“Come on, Tiger. Tell me.” Harry said, grabbing ahold of Louis’ earlobe with his teeth. Louis’ eyes rolled back into his head at a particularly good thrust. 

“You. You, Harry  _ fuck. _ It’s always you.” Louis whimpered out, throwing his arms around Harry’s neck and pulling him down so he could shove his face into Harry’s neck. Harry groaned at the albeit expected response. 

“Yeah? What did you think of me doing? What was I doing to you baby?” Harry asked, now rutting his hips against his mattress like a dog in heat, which is exactly how he felt. Louis was riding Harry’s hand and all Harry could do was watch and take it. He was willing to give this man in front of him whatever he wanted, and if that was his hand so he could fuck himself into an orgasm then that’s how it was going to be. 

Louis felt like he was on cloud 30 at this point. He had three long fingers, that belonged to  _ Harry _ , mind you, shoved so far up his arse he swore he could feel them in the bottom of his stomach. His brain to mouth filter was apparently as shot to hell as his voice was because suddenly he was voicing all the thoughts he had been trying to keep under wraps.

“Fuck, so much. I want to do everything with you. I thought,  _ unng,  _ I thought about this, thought about your fingers.” Harry moaned and bit at one of the numerous spots on Louis’ neck that were turning a nice shade of purple. “I thought about you wanting me, getting hard for me.” 

“I do want you. Want you so much baby.” Harry said, kissing Louis and going from rubbing his cock against the bed to rubbing it against Louis’ leg. Louis gasped at the hot feeling of Harry’s cock against his thigh. It did wonders for his ego that  _ he _ was the one that did that to Harry.  _ He  _ is the reason Harry’s so worked up right now.

“Thought about you fucking me, too. Want you to fuck me so bad Harry. Please.” Louis begged, reaching down to grab ahold of Harry’s length. Harry hissed at the feeling, fucking into Louis’ hand as his fingers fucked into Louis’ now very ready hole. 

“Want that too, baby,” Harry said, slowly taking out his fingers. “Want to make you feel so good. I’m gonna show you how much you mean to me Lou.” 

Louis didn’t know whether to whine at the loss of Harry’s fingers and the sudden rush of emptiness he felt, or to moan at Harry’s words, but whatever noise did come out of his mouth was enough to have Harry hurriedly reaching for the condom next to Louis’ head. Louis shot his hand out to stop Harry.

“Are you clean?” Louis asked, looking up at Harry through his eyelashes. The look alone made Harry groan, not to mention the idea of what Louis was insinuating did to him. Harry nodded his head. Louis bit his lip and looked down, blushing even more (if that was even possible), before saying,

“Then I don’t want to use one.”

Harry had known that’s what Louis was going to ask, but the thought of this man handing him this much trust on a silver platter for their  _ first _ time together, it made Harry’s heart skip a beat. 

“Are you sure Lou? I don’t wanna make you feel pressured or anything baby, I’ll take whatever you wanna give me.” Harry said, leaning down to kiss Louis’ cheek and rest their foreheads together.

“I know. I want this. Thought of that too, when I’d get off. I’d think of you filling me up. I want it, Haz. Please.” Louis said, kissing the younger man on the mouth before he had the chance to say anything. As if Harry even could. He was speechless. The idea of Louis, three fingers deep inside of himself, thinking of Harry  _ filling him up _ , made his cock want to explode on sight, but he had to control himself or this state of heaven the two men seemed to be in would be destroyed far too early. 

“Fuck, Louis.” Harry said, panting into Louis’ ear. “That’s so fucking hot. Of course I’ll give you what you want. I’ll always give you anything you want, baby. I love you so much.” Louis giggled and kissed Harry again. 

“Then hurry up, you git.” 

Harry grabbed the lube and went to pour some on his hands, but Louis grabbed the bottle before he had the chance.

“Let me.” He had said, before pouring the substance on his right hand and discarding the now useless bottle somewhere for them to find much later. Louis was now sitting up on the bed as Harry was up on his knees, hands on his hips, watching intently as Louis reached out to grasp him with a wet hand. Harry threw his head back at the sensation. Louis’ smooth hand with the cold glide of the lube made Harry want to do unspeakable things, and he only wished Louis would hurry with coating him so he could get to the act he’d been thinking about since the night the two of them met at that stupid fucking party all those months ago. 

Louis slid his hand up and down Harry’s shaft once, twice, three times before he deemed him ready. Harry honestly felt like he could cry with how many emotions were rushing through his head, and so could Louis; but for different reasons entirely. Louis wanted Harry to fuck him ten ways to next Sunday, sure, but he was terrified. He hadn’t had anyone since Timmy, and even then it wasn’t good. Louis hasn’t had genuine sex in such a long time and he was terrified of messing it up. Harry has made him feel so good in so many ways that he didn’t even know were possible, and he wanted to keep doing this for as long as he possibly could, so he didn’t want to ruin it by not being as good as he wanted to be for Harry. 

Harry laid the two of them down on the bed, himself above the now quivering Louis. 

“Are you okay love? You still want to do this?” Harry asked, kissing Louis. Louis nodded his head.

“If you don’t get inside of me in the next two seconds I swear to--” Harry cut him off with a kiss. Harry gripped Louis’ hip with one hand, probably way too hard as Louis could definitely tell there would be bruises there tomorrow, and guided his cock towards Louis’ hole with the other. Once Louis felt the warm, wet tip of Harry pushing against his rim, he moaned and threw his head back against the pillows. Harry kept pushing until the head of his cock popped through Louis’ tight resisting hole, and groaned into Louis’ neck.

“Shit, Louis.” Harry said, trying to control his breathing. Louis had seemed to have  _ stopped _ breathing altogether, but Harry was too busy trying not to cum that second that he didn’t notice. “You feel so good baby. So tight, fuck.” Harry slowly slid some more of his cock into the man underneath him, noticing how tense Louis was and the little pained noises he was letting out. “Do you want me to stop Lou?” Harry asked, halting his hips and staying half inside of Louis, half out. Louis immediately shook his head, just like every other time he’s been asked that tonight. 

“No, no, no, please don’t stop.” Louis panted, shaking his head in the crook of Harry’s neck. “I just, I can’t. _ Fuck.” _ Louis couldn’t get his mind to focus on what he wanted to say to Harry, couldn’t cut through the fog that was currently his brain. He felt like he was floating, and he needed something to ground him.

“Ssh, what is it baby? What can I do?” Harry asked, nuzzling Louis’ neck with his nose. Louis threaded his hands into Harry’s hair and pulled just the tiniest bit, reveling in the noise that Harry let out. 

“Just hurts a bit.” Louis said, trying not to let his blush overtake his entire body. He didn’t want to be like this. He wanted to be  _ good _ for Harry, he wanted Harry to keep wanting him like this. He didn’t want him to be turned off because Louis couldn’t take him right away. 

But all of Louis’ fears melted away when all Harry did was coo at his boy, this man he loved with his entire heart laying underneath him. 

“I’m sorry baby, I’ll go slow.” Harry said, kissing Louis on the mouth. Louis just whimpered onto Harry’s lips as the man continued to kiss him. 

After what felt like ages for the two men, Louis’ hole had stopped throbbing and there was only an underlying sense of pain while the fact that he was going to be filled was giving him more pleasure.

“Harry, Haz, move please.” Louis said, licking into Harry’s mouth. Harry nodded his head and braced himself on top of Louis. Before he pushed farther into Louis, he searched around beside him for the lube that Louis had discarded and poured some more around where he and Louis were joined together. Louis’ body jolted at the cold sensation on his rim before moaning as Harry spread it around with his forefinger. 

“Don’t wanna hurt you baby. Just wanna make you feel good.” Harry said, kissing the shell of Louis’ ear. Louis was about two seconds away from crying at how kind and generous Harry was being. Louis knew he didn’t deserve it. Hell, not even two hours ago Louis had almost left him for another dude. And it wasn’t like the other guy held a candle to Harry, no, Louis almost left him for somebody who would’ve treated him like shit and torn down all the progress Louis had managed in the past year and a half. 

All thoughts of crying were thrown out the window once Harry started pushing the rest of himself inside of Louis though, because for the first time in a  _ long _ time, Louis felt nothing but blinding pleasure zip through his entire body, causing his back to arch up into Harry.

“Yeah? Feel better baby?” Harry asked, nipping at Louis’, honestly at this point abused, earlobe. Louis moaned.

“So much. So good Harry, fuck, so good.” Louis spluttered, rocking his hips back ever so slightly against Harry’s cock. Harry eventually bottomed out and both men groaned simultaneously. 

“You’re so tight Louis, fuck. So good, feel so good for me. I love you, I love you so much baby.” Harry said, kissing Louis with a burning passion that left Louis’ lips feeling bruised. Louis just whimpered.

“Move Harry, please.” 

So Harry slowly slid out of Louis, both men basking in the pleasure it brought them, before he fucked back in just slightly harder than before. It wasn’t much, but the movement punched the air out of Louis and he clenched down on Harry so hard Harry had to bite his lip to keep from actually howling. 

Harry built up a slow, but incredibly satisfying rhythm. He would slowly pull out of Louis, dragging every single sensation along as long as he possibly could, before fucking hard and deep back into Louis. Louis was gripping onto Harry’s back so hard he was going to leave bruises that rivaled the ones Harry left on his hips. At one particularly good thrust, Louis let out a moan so loud Harry’s eyes shot open, and scratched his fingers down the length of Harry’s back, making the younger man hiss. 

“Yeah? You like that?” Harry asked, keeping the same angle from the last thrust. “Was that your spot? Did I find it?” Louis nodded his head and began to spit gibberish into Harry’s mouth.

“Yes, yes,  _ right there _ Harry, fuck. So good, please don’t stop. Don’t stop.” Harry shook his head.

“Never gonna stop. Always gonna give you what you need Lou, always.” 

Harry continued to thrust into that same spot, abusing Louis’ prostate until the older man was crying out into the air of Harry’s bedroom.

“Touch me Harry, please. I need you to touch me, need to cum so bad. Please, please, please.” Louis begged.

Harry put all of his weight onto his left arm as he took his right hand and gripped Louis with it. Louis moaned and thrashed against the sheets as Harry began to tug him off. The older man let out these little “uh, uh, uh” every time Harry would thrust and pull him off at the same time, and Harry was so close to cumming his head hurt, but he needed Louis to cum first. 

“Come on baby,” Harry said, thrusting harder into the man underneath him. “Show me how pretty you look when you cum. I need it. Need to see how good you look while I’m filling you up, come on Louis.” Harry continued to spurt what was probably absolute nonsense into Louis’ ear as the older man came closer and closer to the edge of release until finally,  _ finally _ , Louis came so hard he saw stars. Every single nerve ending in his body was on fire and all of his muscles clenched so hard it made Harry cum immediately. 

He couldn’t take the tightness that was suddenly now Louis’ body, and he spurted ribbon after ribbon of cum into his boy, both rocking against each other to ride out the force of their orgasms. Harry moaned long and hot into Louis’ ear as he felt himself cum, and all Louis could do was whimper and take it as he was filled with Harry’s release, the liquid feeling like molten lava inside of him. He never wanted to be empty again. 

Once the two men caught their breath, and Louis finally let go of Harry’s cock, Harry pulled himself out of Louis, groaning as the cold air of his bedroom hit his softening dick. Louis whimpered and rolled his hips into the bedsheets below him as he felt Harry’s cum dripping out of his arse, and his entire face heated up as he opened his eyes and realized Harry was just watching it drip out of him.

“Haz,” Louis whined. “Stop it.” Harry just looked up and grinned at the man laying on his bed. 

“You’re beautiful. And you were amazing.” Harry said, sitting up to give Louis a sweet kiss on the mouth, a kiss that was the exact opposite of everything they had just done. “I love you so much.” 

This time, Louis actually did tear up, choking a little as he responded with,

“I love you too Haz.” 

Harry just grinned and kissed him again before getting up and walking to his washroom to fetch a damp flannel to clean themselves up with. 

Once the two men were - relatively - clean, they lay tangled up with each other under Harry’s blankets. Harry lay on his back with Louis’ head resting on his chest as their legs intertwined and Louis' toes rubbed against his calves. It was a feeling Harry never,  _ ever _ wanted to give up. Their peaceful silence was broken when Louis whispered,

“Harry?” Harry looked down to see Louis already looking up at him.

“Yeah baby?” He asked, kissing the top of Louis’ head. Louis smiled and nuzzled further into Louis’ chest.

“Thank you. For everything.” He said, kissing one of the sparrows that lined Harry’s collarbones.

“You have nothing to thank me for Lou. Nothing.” Harry said, rubbing the small of Louis’ back with one of his hands.

“I have everything to thank you for,” Louis argued. “I treated you like shit,  _ especially _ tonight, and you’re still here. I can’t tell you how grateful I am for that. I love you.” Louis was tearing up again and Harry just would not have it. 

“Louis, I love you. And not just because we had sex. I told you, I’ve loved you since that night at the park. Nothing's gonna change that. You just needed time, and you got it, and now you’re here. That’s  _ all _ that matters to me. Now shush, you need a nap before I take you again in the shower later.” Harry whispered the last part into Louis’ ear, making the older man giggle. If Harry saw nothing wrong with Louis’ behavior, then Louis was going to accept that. Because he finally got one of the good guys, and he wasn’t about to mess that up.

“Louis?” Harry asked as Louis was drifting off to sleep. Louis hummed. “I love you, Tiger.”

All Louis could do was smile.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you liked it! Please comment and let me know what you think!


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